My 13 year old smokes weed, what can I do?

Educate him on it.
He’s going to smoke either way.

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This reminds me of a time when I was in a foster home. I snuck out and went to my boyfriend’s. About an hour later a group of us were sitting there and a knock came at the door. Us being completely stoned answered the door and there stood my very angry very stern foster dad. He was a man of color and a preacher and he was having none of my crap AT ALL. He very calmly looked at me and told me to get to the car. The very next day he took me straight to the city morgue. A little scared straight if u will. Did it keep me from smoking it again? No. I did however wait until I was no longer in his care :grinning_face_with_smiling_eyes:. Me, personally, my thoughts are “what can ya do?”. If u call the police, u make ur kid a target to bullies. If u say go ahead and smoke it, if someone laces it, u gotta live with that. Buy him some edibles :woman_shrugging:

I don’t see anything wrong with it as long as he’s responsible with it. Like don’t take it to school do his work pass his grades ext my daughter smokes she’s 17 I smoke. My husband smokes. It’s a plant :seedling: not a drug.

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He’s 13. Would you be okay with him drinking at this age? Ground him, give him an earlier curfew, not allow him over at that particular friends house, do whatever it is you would do when he gets into trouble. Weed really isn’t a big deal - for an adult. Not a 13 year old child. Good luck x

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13 is a bit young…. Figure out why he is doing it why is he looking for an escape … maybe he needs a hobby / different friends. I think around 16 is okay but 13 is too young for me

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I have been waiting for this day with my kids tbh.
I am a medical user for autoimmune issues.
BUT I don’t want my kids to use it. Esp at a young age. I just personally feel young ppl are to quick to use it as a coping mechanism and that can open doorways to bad habits in mental health down the road if abused, just like any drug.
And also just like any drugs I feel their brains are to young and still growing and don’t need any more garbage messing it up. But I feel that way about aspartame too so I just worry.
A couple times at a party is one thing, but to use all the time at a young age opens up doors for problems if you ask me

I’m very strict. When I caught my child smoking I drug tested him. His phone and playstation were taken away until he could pass a drug test. After that I would do random testing. I am not against weed at all but teens brains are still developing and its it’s not good for their health at that age. IMO

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I’d download and print some facts about the usage and addictions of it. (Yes it actually is addictive) try to speak to him like he’s an adult but still let him know that you don’t want him doing that.

Honestly if he wants to smoke it he will find a way. As long as he’s being responsible and he will soon find out when he throws up everywhere that he’s had too much

My daughter is 14 and has been smoking for a year now. We didnt find out right away but we also know now. We did all the things parents are supposed to do. Grounding, taking shit away, tried yelling etc… if they do it they will do it. Currently our rule is as follows: you are going to do what u want so dont be dumb about it and dont be blasting it all over social media. Dont bring it into our house and dont steal shit from people to get it.

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I feel like he should wait. Explain to him that he’s still to young to partake in those kinds of activities. Don’t shame him for doing it but since there is that mutual respect between you two I think he will listen to you and how you feel and hopefully respect your opinion on him smoking. If he does decide to go behind your back then I would start the discipline. What I look at is atleast he was honest about it, there was no hiding it and as you said y’all are close so hopefully there shouldn’t be any issues in him just waiting :heart:

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Drugs at this age is a disaster waiting to happen he doesn’t drive so don’t allow him unsupervised. I don’t freak about weed but I feel it could be a gateway drug. If your that close and since he was honest I wouldn’t punish but I certainly wouldn’t allow it to continue.

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What a screwed up world we live in when people think it’s ok to smoke weed at 13 years old! It’s ILLEGAL at that age!!! They are still growing and developing!!! They will develop a tolerance and just try harder drugs as they get older!!!

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You are the parent. You are not a friend. Act like a parent and handle it!! :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes:

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He gonna smoke regardless mom!! Just let him know the ins and outs. Like don’t smoke nothing you didn’t see rolled, don’t take it to places you know will get you in trouble etc… it’s great he even felt comfortable to tell you!!

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You can be strict but in reality he still gonna figure out how to do it behind your back. I rather have him tell me that’s he’s doing it and when he’s doing it so you know where he is and that he’s safe . I rather have him do that then drunk and go behind your back.

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Frequent in home drug testing and privileges taken away and if it gets to a point where he won’t stop and it’s affecting his life put him in a program for addicts maybe he will take it more serious. This coming from someone who is pro marijuana . He’s a child if that’s what he wants to do he can wait until he’s of LEGAL age to it depending where you live some places it’s perfectly legal for recreational use other places not so much . Good luck mama I know it’s hard feeling like you have no control over your child and his life and his choices I hope this helps !

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I would tell him his brain is still growing and it can stunt his learning and growth. He is probably going to find ways to do it anyways but atleast he will be conscious and hopefully not overdo it.

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Educate him and provide a safe place. He is gonna do it. May as well make sure he is safe.

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At 13 will u give ur son pain pills if he broke an ankle… if u say yes they ur giving him a drug worst then weed. If u also said yes then ask ur son what does smoking it help him with?. Anxiety i bet thats why my son does it. I rather him smoke then take pills that will make him think about killing himself . Weed aint bad, people just brainwashed us to think it was. Only my opinion

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Teach him to be responsible.

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Warn him that marihuana is often laced with fentanyl or other things just as deadly.

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We told our teen son that we know he does it, he’s just not to do it inside the house. He’ll go out to his car if he wants to just not inside the house

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I would also tell him that THC accumulates in his brain and in teens when it starts to build up in there it can cause bad things like hearing voices so it’s important that he doesn’t abuse it especially at his age while his brain is in such a big stage of growth.

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Educate your child on what it is. The dangers & safety. Driving etc. It is not herion it is a plant with many useful benefits…however I do think 13 is definitely too young. Good luck

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The amount of old folks commenting like it’s fucking meth lol it’s weed a natural herb plant get over yourselves and do research on it. It’s way better then the pills you shove down your throat with many side affects. He’ll go behind your back and you will make him feel like he has no safe place with you about anything. When speaking to him about it the tone of your voice and what you say will affect him so try to have a open mind before jumping on him

Educate him as much as you can and later on in life he will thank you for being supportive when he was honest with you.

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Yes it definitely seems too young, but also so many people start at that age. Just continue an open and honest relationship with him, and talk to him about your concerns. Marijuana isn’t bad, but its not really good for you at that age when your smoking just to get stoned.

Information is key. Find some good information on the web or you tube that discusses the long term effects on the mind. Also about addiction and his ability to make good choices for himself. Remind him he has to be responsible for himself and you would back him in his corner when making the best choices for him. Knowledge is power. But the most success will be from him making the decision and not being forced into a corner.

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Education about the impact on drugs is key.
You said your close so depending how you come across to him he should listen and take it in. Unfortunately I up to your boy to make the right choice. Keep at him. You’ll get through I’m sure xx

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I’m sorry I was not going to say anything but some of you yikes… first 13 is to young to smoke anything vape,cigarettes,pot … with that Teens will lie to you even the good ones…lol the fact yours did not says your already doing something right … putting the hammer down will only make him think twice next time he answers truthfully…js

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It’s medicinal for young kids, as young as 7 years old for a leukemia patient actually. I won’t go overboard about marijuana that’s proven to treat anxiety, depression, eating disorders, pain, ect.

go to Marijuana store and ask questions of the workers to get informed about it. I do not like it but my 38 year old son smokes and now glad as he did hard drugs and I did not know. so most important is to talk to him and never punish him for telling you the truth

Seen enough severely mentally ill men that started smoking that young. If its a coping mechanism it’s unhealthy. They then can’t handle life…in some cases.
One died …no 2. 1 overdose on stronger drugs and one took his own suffering schizophrenia.
they can get really severe issues later on in life. Not worth it, for them or anyone around them in my opinion.

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Maybe offer to smoke with him :woman_shrugging: in an environment you both feel safe in. For others saying he will build a tolerance and try harder drugs. Not always :woman_shrugging: just be open and supportive ask him why he feels the need to smoke. If its peer pressure id knock that off quick! If its to help with mental health, try sitting down with him and find other options if you’re not open to smoke with him and show him the ins and outs of what to look for.

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Let it go. It’s weed lol.

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Youth become addicted when they start early. Learning disabilities, mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, bipolar. More dangerous life than people think

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Good luck my daughter started at that age I tried everything to stop her nothing worked now her 17 year old is doing it as he has been brought up with this as the norm I hate the smell of it and what it does to you. He used to be such a sweet polite child his personality and attitude has completely changed

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I would educate him on both How to use it safely and to only get it from rapid old wool places not just some random person off the street because of what can happen and how today’s weed is weed is usually laced with something else. Then I would look up what smoking does does it matter if it’s weed or cigarettes But what smoking in general does to our bodies in a physiological way and how it affects our body And then let him make his own decision after learning all the facts and then go from there.

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It can be very dangerous for teens, look up paranoia & schizophrenia caused by marijuana. Make sure he has all the information.

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He wouldn’t be seeing that friend again, and I would speak with the friend’s parents. Depending on that conversation I may or may not call CPS. Too many people want to be a buddy and not a parent.

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He needs to stop and find new friends.

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You can’t stop him. But you can setrules for your home . such as do not bring it into thus home nor smoke here. Tell him your personal feeling abt smoking it. Educate him. It is still an addiction and some ppl do go overboard with smoking. You dont want him to become a burn out.

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“Offer to smoke with him”
“Let it go”
He’s 13, people. Not 18. :roll_eyes:

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nothing good came from me smoking weed at 13, but I didn’t have parents to tell me no. At least you can change that for him.

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As an avid weed smoker, I’ve told my kids they should wait until they graduate high school. But I know at least 1 has tried it, so I just repeated my request and continue to be open with them and nosy as hell lol

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It’s just pot dont freak out but also ground him when he gets caught. You still need to discipline if you dont want to allow it.

With our children there was s rule you want to try something you tell us what it was and we would get it and do it at home. Weed was there choice and alcohol. Not one of our children have any problems with law enforcement or not graduating high school. Our children didn’t really wanna drink and smoke weed when they turned 18 and 21. An those of you who are going to say we were bad parents for having them try things at home verses at parties and not finishing school getting in trouble all the time with law enforcement they all have good paying jobs and have respect for others and have 2 that are ex military. So don’t come at me with how we should have never done that. Our children were at home safe and have no medical issues from any of it. Everyone parents differently.

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My husband started at age 13, which blows my mind cause it’s so young. I smoked weed at 16. We both smoked often until we had kids. Now it’s more of a fall asleep at bedtime thing.

I honestly don’t know how I’d feel if one of my girls started at 13. I’d rather them not smoke anything ever, but that’s unlikely. I’d just hope they’d be honest and I’d be honest with them. That I’d rather them wait a few more years until their brain is more developed and they can make better decisions. :woman_shrugging:t2:

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My Hubby used to smoke it over 10 yrs ago since he was 14 but quit due to he kept failing drug tests for certain jobs and found out it’s just not worth it anymore.

I smoked weed at 13. My mom always said she’d rather me do it at home so she knew I was safe, rather than somewhere else with god knows who.

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Praise him for being open and honest with you. I’m probably the oddball here but I don’t think it’s the end of the world. Yes it’s weed, yes he’s only 13. But of all the other drugs out there and the things he could be doing :woman_shrugging:t2: obviously you should tell him he shouldn’t be doing it but if he chooses to how to be responsible with it. And all these other people get out of here withbyour BS you were a teenager at one point too, like you didn’t do anything you shouldn’t have

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Nope. Either you get it legally or he can’t do it, period. You don’t want to end up where my family is. Lost Voices of fentanyl The Fentanyl Awareness Coalition

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So I guess all the Indians was bipolar

He’s 13 … put him to bed with a fruit shoot and let him think about what he did!

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I’ve been through this and you can’t stop him he will keep doing it if he wants too I tried for many years to stop my son but no luck it just made everything worse

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Teach how to be responsible with it. Suggest he does it at home if need be and not in these streets. Teach him how to roll his own blunt because Mfs out here lacing em…

One thing I know for sure, if he wants to smoke , he’s gonna find a way to do it. So it’s better to just teach him how to be responsible with it

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Keep communication open. Flipping out will shut him down and possibly but your relationship at risk. 13 is young, but marijuana isn’t terrible. I was that child that would do something just because I was told I couldn’t so I try to take a softer approach with my kids.

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I’d just educate him on the affects of weed on the developing brain. At 13 and 14 and through adolescence his brain is really having a huge “growth spurt” for lack of better words. His brain is really growing in areas of decision making, impulse control, and risk vs reward. Starting marijuana at this age could delay or stunt these developments. Ask him to give it a few years to give his brain the best chance or at least encourage sporadic use and not daily use. I’d keep tabs on friends too but that’s just me. Maybe encourage the friends and my child to hang at my house more than other friends houses.

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Be glad it’s just pot. But tell him to be careful and if he’s going to do it, do it somewhere safe.

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Easy he’s not grounded for being honest
He’s not allowed to go to said friends home again and I’ll have a conversation with their parents because who tf do they think they are allowing my child to use drugs in their home

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Marijuana is the problem? :thinking: The doctors give our kids methamphetamine like at age 7 let’s evaluate the real problem

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I wouldn’t straight out tell him he can’t but I would certainly question him more to find out why he feels the need to use it. Is this something he is doing because his friends are? Is there something emotionally he is trying to cope with. Unless you intend to be with him every second of everyday its going to be impossible to stop him. We were stern when it came to the juul pods with our kids. They battled us tooth and nail, many miserable months for them and ourselves in the battle. We finally got to the point where we said IF you wanna use them use them, learn from your mistake but we will not buy them, you may not bring one into our home. We did weekly bedroom sweeps and bag checks when they came home. We confiscated so many at first but after about a year they were tired of losing out on their money and craving nicotine when they would get ground for bring one to the house that they stopped.

I started smoking at that age it has always been my go to for anxiety and stress as an adult I’m a legal medical patient. I’m not saying it’s a good thing but it might indicate that he has some things going on. Also probably an unpopular opinion but I personally find the risk and side effects to be less than they are with prescribed anti depressants, anti anxiety, and pain meds. Talk to him find out what’s up work on a plan that works for both of u.

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Explain your concerns, bring this up with his doctor and they can put in their 2 cents. I would also speak with someone in law enforcement depending what state/country (different laws) you’re in, therefore if he decides to continue doing this he is well aware of the severity of the consequences before him. I would also speak with the parents.

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Just ask him why, tell him what it does, that he doesn’t need weed at his age and it is more like medicine anyway. Take away some privileges, and leave it at that.

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That’s amazing that he confessed. I would let him know your opinion on it. As long as it doesnt interfere in his goals and it doesnt become an addictive behavior I think he is one on the many.

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Since he’s under age, I would communicate that he can get into trouble with the federal government because he’s under age and it’s not legal. Communicate the importance of saying NO and walking away when drugs are around. It’s important to give him confidence that he has the choice to say no, if he wants to do it when he’s older then so be it but for now focus on healthy and productive things for your son to stay busy with. Yes weed is legal for adults but he has a ways to go.

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I agree with the people above. It’s only weed. He could be doing pills, or WORSE, but he’s not. If he’s got decent grades and not smoking when he’s off to school, just leave it.
Marijuana has more benefits than I could even name. ESPECIALLY for mental health! I would check in to see if that’s his way of feeling better mentally

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Take him out to a coffee shop, whatever and explain the dangers of marijuana at a young age. Tell him about the possibility of it being laced. Etc etc.

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Probably unpopular. But. Personally, if he was honest, I’d tell him WHY it’s not a good idea(not just “don’t do it”) and explain its not for teenagers. Their brains are still developing so much. He might choose to continue doing it, make sure his grades don’t fail and he doesn’t start getting into trouble. He has to be responsible if he wants to use marijuana. I’d talk to the parents but don’t ban them from seeing each other. Weed is not the biggest issue a kid can have so I will be grateful if that’s the only thing I’d have to deal with. If it were me, I’d tell him IF he wants to continue using it, he HAS TO do it inside your home. No partying type stuff or with friends unless those parents give permission. You’ll know whether he does it to be cool or if it actually helps him or he likes it for x reason. Communicate with him. At the end of the day, that is your child and you just have to do what you think is best. Our opinions are ours and we don’t know everything.

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Compromise like I did 15 years ago
You can’t stop it so let them smoke at home under certain conditions

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If he wants to smoke…hes going to smoke. Theres little you can do about it tbh. You can tell him you’re not happy but nagging will just make him sly about it and at least if you know you can watch.
Teach him to roll his own so he cant get slipped something. Teach him to be responsible with it…not at school , work done first etc . Not in the street . At home where he’s safe
Hes young …but he could be doing a lot worse.

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Be thankful he trusted you to be honest. Don’t ruin that by going to the parents or punishing him and trying to prevent him from seeing his friends. It will back fire he will start lying and keeping secrets and doing more behind your back.
Just talk to him about concerns , let him know how you feel about it and why, etc and tell him he needs to keep attendance and grades at school and no high or drunk driving (when it’s time)

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Man it’s some weed let ur kid be who they are experience their own decisions and deal with their own consequences because this isn’t our life to live and no one is meant or wants to be controlled!! As a parent we are supposed to correct and guide ! He could be out there in them streets bein a jitt robbin n killin other people’s sons but instead he wanna smoke sum herb n laugh at shit come on now I kno u done tried some weed

Teach him responsibility, if hes going to do it make sire he does it in a place he feels safe and no harm can come to him…teach him that weed is a “gateway drug” and to please not take it any further than that…teach him about addiction, if hes going tonuse weed dont take it any further

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Well in oklahoma it is legal so I would just be getting him his card to smoke legally.

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i started at 14 because i struggled badly with anxiety and what i now know is bipolar. it was a long ride and was hard for my mom (who does smoke but never did around me). this may be an unpopular opinion but personally marijuana has helped me more than any narcotics have so far. not saying that they don’t help, but it is a nice alternative. i would just find out if there’s a deeper reason he’s wanting to smoke. you’re a real one for not blowing up on him

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I started smoking pot when I was 14, I told my parents i was doing it. Not much they could do when i grew up around it, both parents did it and still do, my partner does it and has a job, I’d rather my daughter use Marijuana than any other drug now days :thinking:

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I smoke weed for the first time in 1969, to 1999. And i miss smoking. I Never wreck my car. Never got pulled over by the police. I learn to read, still not real good. One of my grandkids smoke weed and he was an A, B honor roll student and he graduated high school. Weed is not for everyone. Some cant handle it.and some can.
But if you are worried about him smoking weed, and if you dont live in a state that its not legal. Tell him it will be heard to get a good job. And not to let weed rule his life.
I enjoy smoking because it releases me. And help with my depression.and anxiety.i had rather smoke weed then taking medication for my depression. I felt better about myself. Now I am depressed more and my anxiety is unbearable. And i don’t drink alcohol, It makes me sick. And have a headache

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I wouldn’t be too upset if its weed. But I would talk to him about alcohol and harder drugs and let him know about the dangers. I would also talk to him about not driving under the influence and make sure his priorities are handled before smoking. Their is such thing as responsible smoking.

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I would explain the difference between pot and other drugs. Unfortunately, weed is lumped in with cocaine, heroin, hallucinogens, etc among our “drug policy” and it simply isn’t true. Do I advocate for people to be pot-heads or young people like him to smoke? Absolutely not. However, I think it is important to be 100% transparent about how even though it is illegal, it is basically benign compared to the other drugs out there. If you say “it’s a drug and it’s illegal” he may think, “well heck it wasn’t that bad… and look, now I am being offered these other illegal drugs and maybe they aren’t so bad either…”

I would emphasis that it is habit forming, it lowers motivation, and although it can be a very great medicine, it doesn’t need to be used if you aren’t sick, especially at his age. Thank him for being honest. Let him know he can always be honest, and that he can always trust you to listen to him without punishing him for being truthful. I think most kids dabble around that age, and if he has other positive things in common with his friends I wouldn’t bar him from hanging out with them.

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Don’t fool yourself. Smoking anything is bad for the health.

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I think - that you should be glad that he told you the truth. If that is all he is doing - consider yourself lucky - definitely talk to him about the dangers of drugs. Marijuana is a plant :seedling:- put here by God - for us to enjoy. If you forbid him to use it - he will resort to sneaking around - I would let him smoke at home and remind him NOT to smoke and drive - as he could get a DUI and they will take the vehicle that he’s driving.

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If my 13-year-old is smoking weed please tell him the consequences Of started addiction because you’re starting a habit that he cannot afford specially being 13 having no job please don’t let him smoke because he can lead to other drugs also or him drinking I mean I know that’s your son but to a mother to a mother and you’re asking for advice it’s a consequence that you have to pay once he starts unless you’re going to apply the habit for him if you’re willing to pay for his weed and his habit then that’s up to u

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Weed, while not bad, is developmentally not good for young kids

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My goodness me I’m in total :astonished:shock…I’m very close to my 13 year old son and always tought him the right way and he knows I will kill him DEAD if he as much as touches just tobacco…I’m sorry but my son won’t be allowed to mix with bad friends ever and he knows because of how I brought him up

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Alcohol is way worse than weed, yet it’s legal and people act like weed is drugs and its a gateway drug which its not, it is a plant.and it does have some medicinal purposes, I’d rather my kid smoke weed than anything else

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How are some parents here saying let him smoke …my goodness me he is only 13 years old :flushed: what the fuck is this world coming to

My thing is, id rather know what my kid is putting into his system when or if he does, than tell him no and have him go get shitty possibly even laced weed somewhere else. Age dont really matter. Your just gonna have to learn to accept it or hes gonna rebel with alot more than just smoking weed behind your back.

I was 13 and my parents resorted to beating me and telling me I couldn’t do it. By the time I was 15 I was on much harder drugs, expelled from multiple schools and a hs dropout. Sometimes being to hard on a kid can make it worse.

My brother was 14 the first time he came to my mom curious about marijuana and by then she was a smoker herself and she let him try it with her. He can smoke at home with mom but not in public with his friends or before school, he also has to keep his grades up and stay out of trouble but he’s not a drinker nor a cigarette smoker, he literally only smokes weed, remains responsible, and him and my mom are closer then ever.

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He was honest with you. He’s going to do it regardless.

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Okay
In this age, Its bad for the brain. Tell him that. It demages the brain, fazer 17 or 18 i think, the demage can no longer be noticed in the reserches.

Go to church as a family.

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Ask for it then whoop that ass

Talk to the parents of the kids house he was at, find out where they even got in the first place

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I have been smoking since i was 14 it helps with my bpd and autism. My mom never encouraged it but never discouraged it. She let me know the pros and cons and allowed me to decide the only rule is i coudlsnt lie to her and i had to be carefull dont smoke with randoms be aware of laced weed l9oked lime etc.

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Oh well could be worse at least he’s doing something God put on this Earth not doing narcotics or heroin

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As long as that’s the only drug be a happy mom.

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Honestly if he’s getting good grades and doing what he’s supposed to I’d let it go. Id neither approve or disapprove of it. My mom freaked out and it only made me wanna do it more :woman_shrugging:t3:

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