Should I let my in laws take my daughter 10 hours away to a beach?

I need some advice. I’m torn because my in-laws want to take my 2 yr old on a trip to the beach, it’s a 10 hour drive. They would be going without us. Yes they keep her often for weekends and such and r very good with her. but that’s super local. I can’t find a way to be comfortable, my anxiety is thru the roof over this.

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My anxiety would be through the roof as well but honestly it’s a good bonding experience for them & if you trust them with her then I would let her go & enjoy my break. You can always call & check in on her.

I would , and enjoy the day off :joy:

Ultimately it’s up to you and what you feel comfortable with. That’s a super long drive for a 2 year old. None of my kids were able to sit in the car that long at that age without stopping for quite a few long breaks. But maybe your little is better with the car rides. Do what you feel is right. Shouldn’t be any judgement here.

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My parents picked my kids up one Friday evening, to spend the night, with plans of taking them to the zoo the next day (about an hour away from home). I got pictures later the next day. They had decided to take them to the beach (roughly 4 hours away). They were about 4 at the time. I trusted my parents with my kids, so I just enjoyed the pictures and the relaxation and my girls had a blast!

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I wouldn’t mind. They deserve to create memories too.

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If it was your parents, would you let them? If yes, it’s no different unless you have some kind of major concern.

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My dad took my kids out of state when they were around 3. Some of their best childhood memories

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I have taken both my grand children on trips from age 2 & up. Making memories for all of us

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Grandma/grandpa took my 2 year old to the south of Texas for spring break. Didn’t come back for two weeks. My kid had a blast. I got much needed time to get stuff done. Win/win.

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As a grandparent, it is a special time to make memories without exterior “noise”. Your child will remember the time they spent with those people they can hardly remember as they get older. In the meantime it’s an opportunity for you and your spouse to reconnect and remember who you are as a couple. Once that baby leaves your house, it will just be you two. Take advantage and trust your husband’s parents!

If it’s outside your comfort zone then say NO! You have to feel comfortable Mama!! :purple_heart::heart:

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Everytime my kids go on a trip with Gparents, my anxiety is crazy. They had been just fine everytime. Let the baby go. She will be 100% safe.

Pack her up and enjoy the break! You trust them. You need to trust yourself to trust them. You will be fine! I left our 8-month old for 8 days in Maine when hubs and I went to Vegas. It felt great!

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That’s too far away for my comfort zone.

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As long as you trust them and your daughter is comfortable with them I don’t see the problem with it. They are her grandparents.

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If you didn’t trust them then you wouldn’t allow them even the local liberty’s of care. They’ve raised children and proven themselves responsible. Let her go and you enjoy some time with your spouse. Even in-laws remember what it’s like to have kids 24/7 and perhaps they’re trying to give you both a break while also bonding with their grandchild. It’s okay to be anxious but maybe try to not let it get away from you. Maybe try and loosen your grip a little and try to enjoy what could be a nice break.

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Perhaps some tea to help calm and let them give you a rest mama, let the baby be embraced with them for bit and drink lots of warm honey and tea.

I would let her go I as a grandmother not on my watch. She will have memories

Trust your instinct ,mom.

My dad took my daughter to Colorado(12 hour trip) over Thanksgiving and they will be going again in June. Granted she is older than your daughter but even if she was younger, I would have let him, I trust him with my kiddo.

“It takes a village…” right? Breathe….settle the anxiety & let them take her. You should want your kids to see the world. Even if that’s only 10 hrs away for now.

No, it’s totally fine not to feel comfortable with that. Each to their own, but it’s your choice, I wouldn’t let my daughter go to another town with anyone :woman_shrugging:t3:

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Agree…not near beach w/o me…nope

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Anxiety is just starting! You have expressed that you trust them with your daughter and you are good with them keeping her with them locally so this is a “you” issue. Not minimizing that because it’s still an issue. It just means that it’s easier to deal with because you don’t have reason to believe your daughter is at risk with the people she’s with and that is a big part of the battle! I absolutely get it. A quick car ride in case of emergency vs. half a day car ride is huge. Maybe see if they are willing to start with shorter journeys to allow you some time to adjust?
For me, I had to think it through logically… IF there’s an emergency, would my immediate presence make a difference? Do I trust the people she’ll be with to make good decisions in my absence? I have gone as far as “researching” nearby emergency services (hospitals, etc). In the end, I found it was good to give my kids that level of separation (occasionally) from me for both of us. But the first time is not easy! In fact it was NEVER “easy”, it just got more bearable. But the anxiety doesn’t go away as our kids become older and do things more independently of us. We have to learn to adjust and the good news is that your daughter would be with people you trust right now

I would say it’s fine. If the baby becomes sick I would immediately take her home for her mommy to comfort.

Let them take her and make memories. Remember, some people don’t have moms and dads and or in-laws to make memories with their littles. You need to appreciate this. Don’t let your personal anxiety stop your child from experiencing things. Technology has come a long way. Just demand face time calls a couple times a day. And random check in text messages to ease your mind.

No I would not! Listen to your Mama heart and instinct!

The 10 hours wouldn’t bother me…the beach would bother me. It literally takes a second for something to go bad…

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At 2 my daughter would not have done well without me for that long, and in harsh conditions like the beach, so it would have been a no for me for now. She would have been fine when she got to maybe 4-5. That’s just us. :woman_shrugging:t2:

No way would my baby be 10 hrs away
I don’t know what your relationship is with them
Just sit them down and tell them
Look I’m not comfortable you taking - to the beach that’s 10 hours away
Maybe compromise
And maybe let them take them to a park /beach
That is local
Good luck

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Don’t hold her back because of your fear… anything can happen at anytime… you must trust them …they are probably just trying to make memories

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Me myself I don’t care who they are or how they’re related to the child they would not take my child 10 hours away from where I live just to spend time with them.
If they can’t take her to a closer place from where they are taking her from then I would not allow it

I personally wouldn’t. That’s a long trip and heaven forbid, if anything were to happen, you can’t be there in just a blink of an eye.

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I don’t let anyone take my kids… we don’t do overnights or trips without parents. But that’s bc I don’t trust my own mother and I don’t Luke how my inlaws treat my kids

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Some parents would feel comfortable with this situation. Others wouldn’t, and both are absolutely okay! I don’t know that I would let someone take my child that far away from me, either. Especially at such a young age.
The bottom line is you’re not comfortable with it. As her mom, you’re allowed to say it’s too much.

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If your not comfortable with it the Answer is no and they should understand that your first instinct is to protect your child and if that means not letting them travel 10 hours away then don’t let them go.

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It’s a big No for me just a little to young for a trip that far away but you do you just my opinion !

I say no. That water is dangerous.

Nope I wouldn’t allow that

Better safe then sorry in my opinion.

As a grandmother who takes her granddaughters all the time on vacations, relax we got this!!! We raised our children and they survived.

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No way unless I was going.

Maybe you need to have this talk with them & explain how you feel.

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No that’s too far to go without you.

2 is too little.
10 year old heck yeah… that’s an older grandchild thing

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If she keeps her for weekends and there is no issues I don’t see the problem.

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Maybe talk to someone (doctor, therapist, counselor) about your anxiety. Seems like you are worried needlessly.

My son’s aunt took him to Disney World five states away before his second birthday and everyone did fine. I got some much needed sleep and a date night or two.

I returned to work 6 weeks after having my kids, so taking the first to day care the first time I cried for a while, though he was fine, so I get it if you’ve been a SAHM and never apart very long it’s tough to let them go. But give her this time with grandma and grandpa. They won’t be around forever.

It’s because it so far and there is water. I am sure they will watch her very carefully. I had a hard time when my granddaughter took my great granddaughter to the beach and that was her mom. I think it’s more to do with the water and the distance.

Not to the beach, it’s a big nope for me. Especially that far away. I don’t let anyone take my child swimming without me or her father being there period but definitely not the beach. Way too many distractions.

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Grow some balls and tell them you’d rather she was older when they take her to the beach you just aren’t that comfortable
.

I would never have been able to let my 2 year old go to the beach without me.

Sorry at 2 …no…Unless I’m going with!! A bit older like 8 but I would not be comfortable at 2 years of age.At 2 they are fast …n it only takes a second for them to get into mischief or danger…My own late mother never allowed me to even spend the night at any relatives house…No sleep overs anywhere…I had my own bed with my own parents that would watch over me with their lives…Didnt bother me ever…

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If you’re uncomfortable they should respect that & let it go. I personally know of at least 2 situations where the child was taken out of state by their grandparents & were injured. They were both complicated situations & the child was in unnecessary pain because the parent was hours away. I would be uncomfortable with my kids being out of state without me as well just for the reason that their insurance may not cover them & I can’t get to them in an emergency.

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If it were anybody rather then grand parents , I would say no , but come on if they ever harmed , her or let anybody else harm her, have they ever lost track of her when they have had her local, , just ask them to check in every few hours , maybe video chat at end of day in on rest stops, I’m sure if she becomes I’ll , they know what to do and would contact you. What grand parent doesn’t want to show their grand babies off just saying. I’m sure their feeling s will be hurt if you say no. Just because you grand parent , doesn’t mean, you forget how to care , for and keep babies safe.

if you dont feel comfortable with it , then that’s ok, keep her home

I never allowed anyone to take my daughter to any water related thing ( beach , pool, lake ) not matter her age .
If you don’t feel comfortable just say NOT

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Question…
Do they often take her there, or r u finding this trip, a little off the wall?

All these moms that think they are the only ones that can take care of a child ! How did their kids survive ?

They raise your husband depends on how they watch your kids when they have them local if there anything they do that makes you nervous just explain that and only if they can listen and respect your rules . And maybe set up a certain time during the day or evening they have to update you or have your kids call you. Video chat so you can see . But listen to your instincts if they scream no than don’t let them. You have to figure out which is your anxiety and instinct.

For me it would depend how long they’re going to be gone for. A weekend yes. A week no. That’s just me personally. & then obviously how much you trust them. If you trust them for sleepovers & stuff id probably let them take her if it’s just for a short time

I would be asking the question of why is she invited but you & your husband are not? Is there a reason why y’all can’t go with them?
I think I would need a little more details before I could give great advice. So without details I would say that’s a hard NO.

If it were me I wouldn’t because anything could happen and the way the world is now…my anxiety would be through the roof so unless I was going as well that would be a big no from me

Do not let them do it. Trust your gut. 2 year Olds are hard to keep track of.

Why wouldn’t you let them take her?? Think about it

This is probably a conversation that you should be having with your husband. Who knows, he might be anxious too?:woman_shrugging:t4: Not only that, people under here are going to confuse you even more. Talk to you husband and your in-laws.

If you don’t feel right about it in your head, heart and gut dont do it. God forbid if something happens, car Wreck, health issues or other things, you will be too far to go help and a stranger will be watching your daughter til you can reach her. Any chance you can go, too?

As someone who doesn’t have family caring for her children, I would kill for a day off lol. In saying that, if your anxiety won’t let up then it’s ultimately your decision. Think about why you’re so anxious though, you don’t want a you problem being made into a problem for your child. If these grandparents are caring for the child regularly and you trust them enough to do so, why does the distance and location change that?
I try hard not to let my anxieties get in the way of my children making memories

Just say no. YOU are the mom

Let them while they are able there will come a time they won’t be able to enjoy it please don’t take that away from them I am a grandma and I can’t enjoy the things or do the things anymore

I would say no, ten hours in the car with a two year old, that far away… especially if your gut is uneasy.

No is a complete sentence. Your child, no explanation needed.

Let her go unless you suspect they gonna kidnap her

That’s a NO . I don’t blame you to have anxiety. I couldn’t do it. No, no , no!!!

Nope! Accidents happen a 10 hour drive is a very long time to get to your kid jic. If you aren’t comfortable with the distance then you aren’t comfortable. They could be the best caregivers and it still wouldn’t matter due to the distance. You don’t even include if this is 10 hours with potty and gas breaks included. At this age they can do a closer to the parents trip and wait until kiddo is maybe older for the swimming.

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For me it would be NO!!! I would worry sick.

Ummm that would be a big NO !!

I would personally say no only on the fact that you couldn’t easily get to her side if something happened. An hour or 2 away I might be okay with but 10 hrs is a little much

If you go the weekends without her, trust them, what’s the difference? 10 hrs away or the weekend, you are still not seeing your child. :woman_shrugging:t2:

They were good enough to raise your husband :woman_shrugging:

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Shame on you especially where you say they have her on weekends.Don’t trust them?plus they had kids too in their lifetime.What the heck,get over it.

I personally would not let anyone take my daughter this far without me. It all depends on how you feel personally.

Personally I will never be 10 hours away from my kid. That’s to long if God forbid something happened. I was 5 hours away visiting my uncle on his death bed and gone for less 36 hours. My kid ended up getting his hand smashed into a door by his older brother. He was 2 at the time. That’s about my limit. 5 max and that’s pushing it.

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My daughter-in-law started letting me take my granddaughter to Disney, which is 10 hours away, when she was one. She’s now 3 and I’ve taken her too many times to count. Like your daughter, I watch my granddaughter and we have a very close bond. She is fine without her mom. I video her mom so she can talk to her.
It’s a win win… you get time alone with your husband and your child gets memories (even if just pictures if they don’t remember), with the their grandparents :purple_heart:

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Get over yourself already.

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If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it. You are the mother. If you don’t feel right about it dont do it! Good luck !:heart::heart:

I say yes. I let my kids travel from Ohio to Wisconsin with grandparents every summer. I’m also letting them go to the beach this year. Let your kids experience everything they can in this life. Let them LIVE. I didn’t do much as a child and I refuse to hold my kids back from going on trips and doing activities because of my own fears.

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Idk my parents took my 2 year old to Galveston and he had a blast and so did they. He came home in one piece. But ultimately you are the parent and should do what you feel comfortable with.

I have a 2 and 4yr old…this would be a hard no for me. I trust grandparents to babysit for a few hrs…I dont even feel comfortable overnight yet. And that’s okay. As try get older I find myself less anxious about them being away, but I’m also a pediatric nurse and I think thats were my anxiety starts with the what ifs.

I would. Anxiety seems to always be a problem for me even now that my kids are older. I let my mother take my 3 month old daughter downstate 6 hours for the weekend. I have also let her take my kids to Disney world for a week. I wouldn’t want to deprive them of that experience. You can always request calls or video calls, but sometimes it makes you miss them more :heart:

Only if you’re good with it

Wow they take great care locally and for weekends so whats the difference?. Pretend its the weekend that you have no problem leaving your child with them.

Omg, chill out. Send the baby and take some time for yourself! It’s family not a stranger. As a grandma I love getting my grands we go all over and mom gets a break. By the way we raised kids to!!! They survived and turned out fine. I’m going to go hug my daughter in law now cause she never puts me through this type of stuff

As a parent I would not ally it. Sorry