He could have been charged with reckless endangerment, dangering the welfare of a minor and god knows what else! CPS could be called! What if there were a fire, babygot sick, or he himself got into ( God for bid) a car accident! Terrible! I don’t know what I would’ve done to him!
He is absolutely wrong for leaving the baby home alone but expecting the kids to be woken up and put in the car at 11 is also not a good parenting decision, you both need to work on things he clearly needs parenting classes so you can have a break where you can be more organised so your kids aren’t being negatively impacted in anyway x
He baby sat FOR YOU? Are they not his kids too? BS. Never leave a child under the age of 10 alone. You have a legitimate reason to be angry.
Might not be worth a divorce…maybe your mom or a good friend could watch them…he’s not a babysitter he’s their father…you’re not ungrateful…
No, you’re NOT overreacting
I think both of y’all had problems in this scenario.
No your not over reacting sorry but I don’t know what was going through his mind to even do such a thing anything could have happened. He should have told you he was sleeping I’m sure you would have preferred to get a taxi home than leave your child home alone
Huge no no. And the fact that he says you’re ungrateful for watching your shared children… Excuse tf out of me. Throw the whole man away.
Ohboy… hes a crappy dad
What an ass if he thinks that is ok.
You both have horrible judgment. Obviously an infant can’t be left home alone, but what kind of mother has her husband drag her children out at that hour so she can go out drinking? You both need to rethink your priorities. We all need a break but that’s not the way to get one.
He’s doing things like that so u won’t leave them with him,It’s a means of controlling you,Instead of saying he doesn’t want you to go out,And cause a argument over u going out with your friends,He uses the kids so u will stay at home,
You are not overreacting. You and the kids needed to be gone from this man.
Not a good thing. But next time get a ride home. Not a good thing to ask him to do at 11:00 at night when the kids are tucked into bed and sleeping to have wake them up.
Why would you even need to ask if you were over reaching? Sorry but your hubby is a mental moron and def lacks parenting skills. I am not sure he would have stayed past him dropping me off he is a danger to your kids
Absolutely the hell not, I’d leave him
Don’t leave the kids alone with him child service finds out you could loose your kids
Immediate divorce. I’d also probably file an order of protection to get sole custody since he can’t be trusted with the kids.
Ya I would be leaving or finding a way. Something could have happened or been in deep trouble with DHS , I would not trust him ever again.
No that is stupidity on his part. You never leVe a child home not me until 14 if mature enough to be trusted
This is the saddest thing I’ve read today. Please protect your kids. Things happen so fast. He knows better!
There are screwups and then there are parental crimes, this is the latter, you have a blank check to punish him any way you want, the law, the court, the anybody will rule on your side, by the way never trust him with your children again
No way that is not ok.
What is there was a fire
As a cps worker, it is ABSOLUTELY not ok. At minimum he was gone 40 minutes. What if the house had caught fire?
It’s not babysitting if it is your own child secondly, what would have happened if that baby would have suffocated or spit up? Men come and go but your kids are forever
If you leave him then share custody hell have them on his own.better to try to get him to read up on that stuff or take a parenting class
Control and don’t leave him with them again he isnt fit and u will lose your children what would u done if baby woke up and was screaming and neighbours so u leave him or if he was sick in his sleep and started choking just happy baby is OK
TBH it sounds like you need to either make him take parenting classes or leave him. My kids dad is also incompetent. Last summer I worked at the fair after being a SAHM for 2 years, also newly pregnant. I tried to call him on my break to no reply… when I came home he was asleep on the couch and our toddler was running around doing whatever. He was asleep for 5 fucking hours while our toddler was alone in the house. I was pissed. Our son was hungry and upset. His dad was full of excuses as with everything else in life.
Now he’s choosing to be an absent parent to both of our kids. Purposefully staying jobless living with his mom because “if I don’t have any money then DCS can’t take my money”.
This is absolutely horrendous…wtf
This is not a excuse , like oh I forgot to take meat out for dinner. This right here poor excuse for a father & he is irresponsible. You are lucky nothing happened or in trouble with DHS. You don’t play when it comes to your kids.
Crazy I would never leave my kids alone especially a baby
Smh. Obviously he knew better
I just read this to my husband and he said “ wtf “ girl that is wild
It’s time to leave your husband that is UNACCEPTABLE… I would NEVER be with anyone husband or not that I couldn’t trust my children to be safe around… it up to you to keep those babies safe and this man shouldn’t be able to care for a goldfish let alone a child
Could you next time take an Uber home or have a friend drive you home so you aren’t in this situation. I gave up my teaching position when I had kids to be a stay at home mom so I know how much work it is and the importance of going out and not losing yourself. I’m now back to work now that they are older but def need time to yourself. Now that you know hubby isn’t reliable call an Uber or taxi.
Why wouldn’t you get a cab?
Your husband is a f*ing moron and if you stay with him…you ARE NOT protecting your children.
Nothing about this is ok.
He sounds like he’s very immature, maybe mentally incompetent as well, and a whole lot lazy. On his days off he may need to be more involved on learning how to care for his children.
Ohh hell no I don’t care if it’s 20 minutes or five minutes away Something can happen in a blink of a night￼
You’re not overreacting at all. He’s a danger to those children because he simply does not care. You’ve educated him and he’s still intentionally being dense. I would 100% leave him and go after full custody with supervised visits. Period.
That’s really bad. Separate and never let him have unsupervised contact
Omg, absolutely not okay! That is horrible! I know the trusting feeling and I could not imagine ever leaving him with the kids again!!!
No that’s terrible the baby can roll over into a wierd position and suffocate and much more than that too
Any person with common sense and any type of knowledge would know this is not okay, holly hell. He’s definitely not anywhere near educated to take care of children. So many things could happen in a matter of minutes. Hopefully he gets some parenting classes done
I would be, beyond pissed. There’s so much wrong with that & the fact the baby was left alone on a bed just adds to it.
No, you’re not over reacting. Don’t ever leave your kids alone with him. Find a trustworthy babysitter. He’s proven he can’t be trusted with them, and he’s proven that he doesn’t want to make an effort to change. In the future, avoid the drama and get a sitter.
If you stay with him you’re as big of a moron as him…I’m sorry but this behavior is completely unacceptable
Gonna get worse… and sometimes you don’t get 2nd chances.
Leave him now! Your children could be taken away.
Sounds like he has IDGAF syndrome. He could less about the responsibility of being a good father! Get rid of him!!
All I can imagine is the little baby laying there crying so not okay!
Imagine if there was a fire?! Anything could happen in a split second. He’s definitely in the wrong for that
To get your husband and children up at 11pm to pick their mother up from the pub is just as wrong
Umm does he want DFS to take your kids that’s not ever acceptable for any reason ever and if he doesn’t know that then he just doesn’t want to be a father because he just doesn’t give a crap.
Weaponized incompetence. This is not ok.
If you don’t/trust him don’t leave them hire a sitter no child should ever be left alone especially 4 month old .
I leave him alone permanently. He’s a idiot
Girl leave him. This shouldn’t even be a questionz
Leave him and get supervised visits.
Leave girl leave! Rung like the wind! If he doesn’t care enough to leave his own child alone while your 20minutes up and 20 back that’s 40 minutes that some one could have broken into your house, a fire, smoke literally any thing. Ughhh I would have been pissed to the max
Uber or get a friend to take you home
I would be livid. He’s 42 and acts like that, which is not an excuse for any age. He’s not dad material. No excuses. I would not even want to be with him.
He is so so in the wrong doesn’t he know what happened to little Mattie " all those years ago & never to be found " don’t ever leave your children with him again "
Not cutting up food is one thing. Leaving a kid home alone of that age is simply not safe or acceptable period.
Hold the actual fk up. You should be GLAD that he was so GRACIOUS to BABYSIT HIS CHILD?! I would have buried him under divorce papers and taken all custody of the kids. Reading this infuriated me beyond belief. He doesn’t deserve a single thing from you other than silence.
yeah that’d be a divorce for me
Why are you with this guy?? I’d lose my shit
Oooo girl… that’s a divorce right there
1: He was in the wrong for leaving the baby at home by himself; anything can happen in the 20 minutes of being gone.
2: You could of also found a ride home instead of calling him since he was at home with the children.
This post has given me serious anxiety…. A 4 month old home alone for over 40 mins ! Absolutely no words!! I’d be gone with my 2 kids!! How did he know the baby wouldn’t wake and be in convulsions or something serious be so wrong! Unforgivable!
Seems like he knew exactly what to do, to make sure he’d not have to watch them while you had a breather.
Omg I would be livid too
Gonna call BS on this one Mamas Uncut— we know if he’s taking the time to load up the toddler- he’s gonna load up the infant— the stories you post lately are really getting far fetched. I understand these pages run on the responses to your posts- but anyone of multiple children can see thru this crap-
It takes seconds to strap an infant into their seat- one could argue it takes more time to load up the toddler into their car seat.
Everyone is always so quick to say leave, go, take the kids. Marriage isnt about just getting up quitting. For one, they have children together. For two, divorce is expensive and can get real ugly. For three, not all states have rules and regulations that support the mother’s opinions(and no i’m not saying leaving the 4month old at home is ok)
My advice would be counseling. This way you can voice your concerns and talk through them with your husband while having help from a professional and a 3rd party individual not invovlved in your family/friend circle.
Also, his age has nothing to do with it… most men never mature😅
And before you come for me Like I said, I’m not sayin what he did was okay by any means. But neither is giving up on your marriage without exhausting all efforts.
You could get charged with child endangerment if you leave your kids with someone who won’t watch them properly. Your best bet is to leave him if he can’t be a safe person for your children. Someone could have literally kidnapped your baby. Your daughter could choke to death and die, love him or not he’s not responsible enough to watch your children alone. So don’t allow it or your at fault too. I’m so sorry.
Next time take an Uber or a taxi or have a friend drive you home. This solves the problem of you getting home, but if your husband thinks it’s OK to leave a little one home alone, this raises the question of his parenting abilities. Is it possible for you to hire a baby sitter or have friends/family watch the kids for you when you want some ‘you’ time which all mothers need at some point?
Keep.in mind that you AND your husband are both legally responsible for the safety and welfare of your children.
Always pay a babysitter and he can pay
Oh hell no you should be reacting wtf is wrong with people
Why would you have had a second child with this piece of crap?
Kids come first. You are a voice for them. Clearly your husband has no voice and no brain. He is very selfish and negligent. If it were me, which it has been me, I would divorce him. I know that’s easier said than done. Start documenting anything and everything involving the kids and him. He is an irresponsible man child. Seriously, this is grounds for a divorce.
No! Just no…I’m horrified just reading your baby was left home Find a reliable person to be there for your babies.
First of all I’d get rid of him thinking that’s OK to leave a baby like that. You’d be constantly worried everytime you’ve to leave them. Be like having another child trying to teach him common sense and second if all it’s actually selfish of you to expect him to drag 2 kids out that age to collect you when they should be in bed
You cant trust him with your children …leave
Well now you have verified proof that he’s a crap parent. What you do with that knowledge is up to you but i know what I’d do.
I sure as hell wouldn’t have anymore kids with him. He sounds like any inconvenience isn’t worth his time (his kids)…
Don’t leave them with him alone again. You can get in trouble and so will he. I dont know what state you are in laws vary from state to state. But it will get you in trouble.
Is it bad to say hotline your husband? Sorry but he needs to be told from an outside source that this was absolutely unacceptable & straight negligence on his part. I would be making sure you have audio & visual recording of him admitting this & leaving until he does some classes & therapy. This puts your children at risk on a whole new level.
He should have NEVER left this baby home alone!! I have a four month old myself and I’m telling you right now his ass would’ve left when we got home and divorce papers would be waiting this morning for him to sign when he came to pack his shit!! Get out mamma before he kills one or both of these babies!! I am livid for you… Honestly I would’ve probably had him arrested if it was my spouse… No excuse for him leaving that baby at home all by itself!! None at all !! Straight up neglect!!!
I would’ve filled for divorce asap. I could see if the child were like 10 years old or older but a baby? I won’t even leave my 5 year old alone in my apartment just to take trash out
Leave him that’s so insane for him to had done that oh if my husband would had done that I would knocked him out. Anything could have happened.
Wrf nah. I’d get rid of him
If you can’t trust him with your kids and he thinks leaving a 4 month alone is okay I would get out fast. You don’t want him to further endanger your kids.
He’s completely out of line morally and legally.
Not overreacting at all! This is majorly unsafe. Also you said sleeping on the bed so does that mean the baby was lying on a regular bed not in a crib/pack n play/ bassinet that he could possibly roll over and fall off the edge of the bed to the floor and get hurt? I would see if there’s parenting classes he could sign up for. Also if you choose to leave this relationship I would suggest having documentation of this type of behavior since this sounds like not the only unsafe behavior of his towards his children so it can help you in the custody case.
You should probably get rid of him before CPS comes for your kids.
They come first.
Your not over acting I would be long gone from that dude ThAts a good way to lose your children
Hire a babysitter if you want to go somewhere without him and tell him to leave you’ve got a babysitter coming my daughter left her baby alone to run to gas station she wasn’t even gone ten minutes I told her anything could of happened in that time if you ever do something that stupid again I will call cps on you myself
This is weaponized ￼ incompetence at its best. You are going to always be the default parent. He isn’t going to change enough to make a difference. You have 3 kids.