I was in that same marriage before sleeping in a different room finally I just said I give up and got a divorce I don’t hate him we just didn’t make a good couple it’s not either one of us fault just people places and things got in the way so instead of being hateful towards each other I told him that I was filling for a divorce and he agreed to it so you can stay not talking to each other or separate and then see where things stand between you and him
Girl you need to get out of there! Nobody deserves to feel unhappy! Everyone deserves happiness! You should’ve left yrs ago I know it’s gonna be super hard where u can’t afford it but things will get better I’ve been there I know your situation!
So many relationships end at 10 years. We seem to grow so much in ten years that if you arent putting time and effort into your marriage all along its over. You can do the divorce by yourself may counties will have classes in self divorce or use a para a legal. If he wont participate in the divorce you can still get one. Good luck.
It’s a two way street. It’s not up to him to “give you a reason” to share a room with him. He’s probably feeling the same way you do. No one just wants to talk about problems all the time either and frankly, if this is where your marriage is, the very last thing you should be talking to him about is all of your problems, especially since you blame him for all of it. Why don’t you start with “hi, how was your day at work?” next time he comes home. Why don’t you ask him if he would like to go out for dinner, or see a movie? I can’t imagine he’s going to be very motivated to do or say anything after you crushed him with “I don’t love you anymore”. You’re going to have to rebuild your relationship and it’s just as much your responsibility as it is his.
Get another man on the side. He’ll come around when he see you’ve moved on🤷🏾♀️
Marriage is a 2 way street, both people need to give 100%. It sounds like he isn’t but what are you doing or have you done to promote a better marriage? If the marriage is too far beyond the point of wanting to try on your end than it might be on his end too. Save money. Make a plan. Work. Move on.
I agree with Becky Rose also stop cooking and doing his washing for him it sounds like he wants to be single too so treat him as single let him do his own washing and ironing and see if that changes things good luck
Check out Adrienne Everheart on YouTube. She’ll help you regardless what you decide to do, I promise.
Been there, done that. He filed for divorce and ran off with his best friend’s little sister 🤷 I lost a lot of my stuff but finally am living my best life here in Florida while he’s still in Michigan lol
If you don’t have kids to support then you need to leave.
If there are no kids involved an amicable divorce is quite cheap. I did mine in 2005 for $350. A friend recently did his for less than $1000. Otherwise, seek a legal separation if you need more time to think and time away from him.
Start saving to move on with your life. It doesnt sound like either of you want to work on things.
I feel you on this one. One day at a time. I know it is so heart breaking and lonely, but all in time, you will get stronger and stronger. Good luck.
If you believe in God, pray for him. Pray for you. Pray for your marriage. That’s the best I can say for this one. Actually try to make it better. It sounds like you are just sitting back watching it fall apart and waiting for him to make it better for you. It takes effort from BOTH. Perhaps marriage counseling could help. Count your blessings. I didn’t see that he is cheating on you or abusive in your post which tells me there is hope if you want to work at it.
Find sources and research ways to leave him. Do you work? Is there anyone you can temporarily move in with if you split? Can HE move out? You could apply for food stamps and other things to help you with money. Or maybe get a second job? It is definitely hard to leave but it is possible. I was a SAHM for the first 2 years of my son’s life and unhappy with the 5 year relationship with his father. I moved back in with my parents, got daycare assistance, food stamps, and got a job as soon as I could. I’m now back on my feet, living on my own and managing my own household and it is such a beautiful, freeing feeling. You got this girl.
Only you can make that decision
I would suggest you begin making arrangements to leave and be a single parent. Apply to some jobs. Network so that you can have someone keep kids and or get them off of the bus or out of school. Put some money to the side. Look for affordable houses or apartments. You also may need to apply for any help you need. All that is stopping you, is you. He may want to work on it, but the way things are now, you will need to step away and decide what you need.
Grab a girlfriend (bestie) roommate and file gf. Life is too short…time to go!
You need to get a job save your money for your own place & move the hell out & file for a divorce. Or you can stay & just keep complaining.Your choice !
U would be surprise how many people live together for just companionship or for the kids sake
Get a job and leave. Its really not that hard.
Tonight make a romantic dinner and then try and sleep in the bed with him and make a move on him and see if he goes for it if he does you may be able to make it work if not well then you know for sure
Sounds like u both need to work at it but u both gave up and once thats the case there is nothing to save
Start looking for a job, a place… a lawyer… take your time and enjoy your life…
One for the same thing for 23 years it’s not worth it you get to a breaking point it’s better to find a small cheap apartment and give up your house so you have your mental sanity it feels really good to be alone and not miserable
Oh wow, I’m in the same boat
FIRSGT YOU GO NTO A LAWYER, which he will have to pay. and then I bet you will have a husband, or money to live on, in your own apt.
stop wasting your life, get a roommate, go stay with relatives or friends, get a job, divorce and get part of the assets.
You mentioned you told him years ago and many times that you don’t love him or want to be with him, the reason he’s not showing affection is cause of this. Sounds like your the one that gave up and he is giving you your space. If you want to work it out go to counciling, if not look for a job, find a place and move on. Relationships are not easy and take hard work and dedication and our a two way street. Both party’s have to both give and take 100 percent for them to work.
So, get up and leave.
The way you feel is nothing that’s not been felt before by millions of people. You know that you deserve better. You are unhappy. And he definitely sounds like he is unhappy.
It’s a painful situation.
I’m not gonna tell you to leave when you clearly are stuck at the moment.
The best advice I can give you is just keep on trying to be the best person you can be. And when the time comes you will be able to say BYE!
I’m in the same boat. My husband says he loves me but never does anything for me to help me out unless I nag until his ears are bleeding. I’ve told him I don’t love him but he doesn’t believe me
Hard to even think about it but once you leave the weight will lift. You will smile again. It will be rough emotionally and finacially. Life is to short so stop wasting your time.
So true do whatever it takes, to get out.
No mention of age here. Is he still working? Are you able to get a job and get yourself established? If you can it will help to be around other adults then start making plans for your future. I assume no children are involved. Take note of what it will cost for rent, food etc and make sure you can do that. Even with divorce funds are not immediate. Divorce can be either he cashes you out on 1/2 of equity or sell and split proceeds. Should see an attorney about options. Just prepare before you do anything…be proactive. I left after 11 years with 3 year son. It was really financially difficult.
Work on it its not only husbands fault it is womens to if we all start complaining the whole world would be divorced think of the old generation my moms and dads time they grew old and they never divorced and didnt have the things we do today have faith dont take things for granted.
What is keeping. U there. ???
If he is not willing to change and make an effort on your marriage theres no reason to stay in something thats will end up toxic. Do what is going to make you happy in the end
Then leave. Am sure you will get help from social services
Leave him! Ask family friends if not apply for low income housing and get a job maybe part time if you are busy. If you have a church you attend ask for resources if they have any information.
Every relationship(marriage, dating, etc) takes work and effort FROM BOTH PARTIES. Don’t be so quick to blame the male solely. Lastly, reaching out to social media for advice with your personal life- your clearly not very attentive to him or his needs. I would highly suggest counseling for both!
Are you telling the whole story .?
Do you not have a phone book with #'s of local attorneys? Are you seriously asking Facebook for advice?
Make affordability…there isnt a price for happiness
Serious question, does he try to “sleep with you”? Or he just doesn’t try and is completely fine with no physical contact between you twi
He ain’t gonna change I went through the phase for bloody 13 years
Leave and make ur life
But why u stuck in thr till now figure out
Go ur own way’s why stay with some ur not happy with nor Love , you deserve to be happy not sad don’t waste ur time move forward, who know’s may be the person ur Looking for has been infront of you all along take care it’s never to late to find the rigth man