I feel like an butt but at the same time I don’t. I have my 37 weeks check up today but I lied and told my husband it was 45 minutes earlier than it really is. Im sitting in the parking lot of my OB office eating Wendy’s in my quiet car taking a moment to breath and relax. My eleven month old had me up all night and so I decided he can take some extra time with our son and im now thinking I’m bad for doing this…… am I?
Girl eat your Wendys and don’t tell him nothing. Go back for a frosty and do not feel bad.
Yes you were wrong. Not for the reasons but for the act itself. If you needed time then just tell him point blank that you need a few extra moments of quiet to yourself therefore you’ll be leaving a little early and staying a little longer. It doesn’t matter the why but if he finds out you lied his trust is broken and he will question everything you say and do.
It’s not the problem you did that… it’s the problem you feel the need to do that and you can’t be open to your husband that you need a break. You deserve a moment to recollect yourself. My husband knows I love baths… we have a 10 yr old, 6 yr old (ADHD) and a 2.5 month old… if he sees me a little stretched thin or if I tell him it was a bad emotional day for me he will pick up the slack with the kids so I can take a hour to myself and grab me a snacky snack and go soak in the bathtub peacefully. You should be able to openly communicate to your husband that you need a moment. He is a parent to…
That stinks you have to do that. My husband would understand me needing that little bit of time to myself.
Been there done that! Don’t feel too bad about it…I mean are the husband’s REALLY pooping in the bathroom for an hour? Nope. They are scrolling looking at fishing rods…lol
I’d do the same thing if I needed a second to myself. It won’t kill him to be alone with his kid for an extra hour.
No gosh no you aren’t bad for taking time to take time for yourself. We all need some quiet every now and then even if it’s just 45 minutes to eat in peace and quiet. However you should just say that. No it’s not a horrible lie or anything but letting our partners know we need a break is letting them know they need to pick up a piece for you and take it on for just a bit. Don’t feel bad
Don’t feel bad about anything especially the negative comments on this thread. If you need time TAKE IT. You’re important and you deserve the me time. It won’t happen often in the future.
Honestly what’s sad is that you don’t feel like you can just tell your husband you need a break to relax! It’s just not something you should only be able to get by being dishonest with him,but that’s just my thoughts on it.
You’re not wrong for taking the time for yourself. You’re wrong for lying to your partner , and if you feel guilty about it you should come clean and maybe that’s the way you open the conversation about him stepping up more so you can have a minute( or 45 whtever) to yourself good luck. Tell him what you’ve done and tell him why you’ve done it communication is key.
It is not wrong to feel like you need some alone time. But I think the lying about it is what’s wrong. I hope you’re in a relationship where you can be honest and just say “hey, I need a break for a bit.”
Lying is lying…but be easy on yourself Mama. Sometimes we do what we feel we have to do in that moment. My suggestion would just be to let him know next time…“I’m gonna leave a little early, because I need a small breather.” You’re pregnant with a toddler, no more should ever have to be said. Good luck
Heck no, dads get breaks all the time. Where the hells are ours? Lol
No you weren’t wrong. You needed that time desperately and 45 minutes isn’t that long. You do need to be able to tell your husband when you need help or time for yourself. If you can’t do that ever then you do have a problem. Good luck
Not at all! Mamas need time to Center themselves and I think you’ve done nothing wrong! I wouldn’t be surprised if your husband hasn’t told a white lie in the same sense!
No… Take all the time you need, Mama…
Heck no! The best thing you can do is take care of yourself first.
Sounds like you had an appointment to check in with yourself before your doctor’s appt. So is it really a lie?
Lying is always wrong. Your reasoning however. Is not.
You are 37 weeks pregnant with an eleven month old? And you think you might be a butthead over smuggling in some alone time to eat fast food in your car? No girl no lol. You are not a butt. I am a mother of 4 and my last 2 kids were born 14 months apart, believe me when I say I have snuck off numerous times to eat fast food in my car. I don’t even let anyone eat in my beautiful car but you can bet your ass I’ll sneak some fast food in it enjoying the peace
Nope-not wrong at all! Take the long way home!
Does he account for every minute of his day away from you…
Hey mama, don’t sweat it. You deserve anything that you need. You are not wrong. I repeat you are not wrong. Do what you need to do and love yourself.
For me only…the fact you felt you had to lie is unsettling. If the boot was on the other foot and it was your husband that lied to you, no matter his justification, would you be ok with it? I’m not in any position to judge, I’m just asking.
You’re a genius!! Good for you girl!
I’m sorry you had to lie but you know what? We all need some time.
For example, does it take me 30 mins to get the laundry from the laundromat in our apartments? Nah.
Am I still in the car with the seat warmer on, commenting here, while hubby has the kids?
You right. Your pregnant and deserves time to yourself too. Actually even of you weren’t pregnant. When in a realtion we always think about the other person but when it comes to us if it doesn’t involve the other we feel like we’ve done something wrong. That it’s unfair. It’s not. We’re human beings too who deserves to feel like a person ourself with quiet time. Even if it’s just for something to eat or sit in the car on your own. It’s OK
Mental health- do what you gotta do to maintain that. Heaven forbid if he finds out you had a Wendy’s burger.
No your not bad. Normally I would just tell my husband but I’ve done things like this as well. Some times…you just need some time. Hugs momma
No don’t forget to dispose of the garbage before your home.
Moms do this. Wait until you learn you can say you’re going grocery shopping but really have an online order ready to pick up.
Gets you at least 2 hours of car time in the parking lot
If you have to lie about needing quiet time, I feel like there’s bigger issues here.
It sucks you feel you have to do that but I understand. You need to take care of you too.
Relax. It wasn’t even an hour. Your children are only at thriving when their momma is healthy happy and humble. Don’t over think. You’re doing just fine
Nope. Not at all eat your Wendy’s in peace if that’s what you need to do.
Nope, you know your husband and the reason why you told him a different time. You deserve a break
For lying yes. For taking some time for yourself not at all. You need recharge time. If you have to lie to your partner to get your needs met I think you should consider your options.
Heck no. Mom’s need a break. I pick up my sister once a week and we go shopping while the baby is home with dad and other 2 are at school.
Not wrong at all. It’s called self care. Hope you got a small chocolate frosty, too!
Love it!! Good thinking
Do what you need to do to keep yourself sane
The women on here saying you don’t have a healthy relationship if you have to lie about a frosty, French fries and quiet time:joy: it astounds me that women HAVE to be built strong. We aren’t allowed time to ourselves or take care of ourselves otherwise we’re bad partners and mothers, but when it comes to our men… they get all the time they need because they deserve it. Who’s to say she doesn’t get the support she needs from her husband?! Who’s to say he’s not controlling? We don’t know any of that. Let’s stop being judgemental people and realize she’s human too.
You do you mama. Get those French fries and frosty! Don’t feel one ounce of guilt while eating it and enjoying your quiet time😘
Nope! Have some time for yourself
Lol girl should of took longer …
OMG. Take whatever time you can for yourself
It’s just 45 minutes. Not worry. It will be okay.
I’m not for lying and if you have to lie to get a breather…. there’s bigger issues.
Take the “me” time!! Next time tell him it’s an early appointment that takes longer
Do this more often. You need these moments and it is his baby too.
Nope I would to and I do. Always add extra time in just for the uncontrolled and when you make it early you time
No, but you shouldn’t have to lie. You need to confess to the husband and tell him that in the future you may need him to take over early so you can decompress before appointments. A loving husband will happily oblige.
Another trick… Do a Walmart pick up but don’t tell your hubs you did an order. Just tell him you’re going to Walmart to shop lmao. Alone time and then pick up your groceries 2 hours later and head home
Hes obviously not someone you can tell the truth too quit while your ahead.
Give the lady a break , bet most of you have told a white lie a time or two
You aren’t wrong for needing time and space. You ARE wrong for lying about it. How will you feel when he does the same thing?
No sometimes a momma needs a mental health day/hour to herself
Why do you have to lie to get alone time though
Why the lie though?? I feel like that signals an issue in the marriage
Sometimes i lie about having a poop… I dont. I just sit on the toilet to find my bearings and catch my breath. Its hard raising kids.
No you are not wrong! Everyone needs some alone time . I’ve done that a million times. I’m sure your hubby has to.
Nope. I used to leave the kids with my ex, and make a trip to Walmart and nap in the car. Then go in to shop.
She went to the doctor. End of story. Doesn’t need to explain her timeline.
Haha no, I sometimes grab a cheeseburger and diet coke by myself and jam out in the car, why not? A few minutes of me time no matter how small matter, keeps you sane. Enjoy it, you probably work hard as mom and wife and you deserve some Wendy’s.
Not wrong at all. I always leave my house earlier anyways. Don’t worry your husband does it too lol. Sometimes we need a little freedom for ourselves
Ladies…smh So quick to judge the husband. Maybe they don’t get much outside help with their kids. Maybe her husband works hard and helps equally take care of the kids but because they have no one else the responsibility solely falls on the other struggling/exhausted parent which brings an overwhelming amount of guilt with asking for some time for yourself… odds are her husband wouldn’t have batted an eye if she had asked for 45 minutes alone.
Girl don’t let these ladies make you feel bad. You needed a break and took one. It’s not like you lied about where you were going and cheated! I think it’s hilarious and good for you for taking the little bit of time for yourself!
Having a village is taken for granted so often. Us parents doing it 100% alone battle things you’ll never understand.
Stay kind y’all
No it isn’t bad. But id hope you feel comfortable enough to tell your husband you need a break for a little bit and hopefully he would completely understand.
No everyone needs a break. Even today I had an appointment to go to after that I got wendys ate in silence then went and got my nails filled its not a bad thing that you took 45 mins for yourself
You shouldn’t have to lie, but if that’s the type of relationship you’re in and that’s the only way you can get a few minutes DO NOT feel bad.
No u are not. Us moms sometimes need to take these breaks . We need to take care of our selves before we can take care of every one else.
I would do that too lol oh wait I totally have… I always leave early so I have time to just sit alone first lol don’t feel bad
No your not bad at all .x
It’s okay. But you should feel comfortable enough to tell your husband you need a break, & he should understand. That’s the only issue I see here.
Take all the time you need mama!