"My sister just told me that her boyfriend flushed her antidepressants a month ago and told her to take some sort of supplement instead. She has been taking the supplements because, in her words, “he flushed my medication so I didn’t have a choice”. Is there something I can do?? Is this illegal?? I take similar medication and I know how dangerous it can be to stop taking them abruptly. She has been with this guy on and off for 10 years and they have a 1 and 2-year-old together. He works on naval ships overseas so he’s gone most of the year, and thankfully he just left last week for a few months. They have a history of pushing/shoving each other but other than that no physical abuse that I know of. But this last time he’s been home he’s been very verbally and emotionally abusive towards her and I can’t stand it. He is also very verbally abusive to my nephews and hits (more than just a spank) my 2-year-old nephew when he’s 'naughty'. She has been a mess the last month and now I finally know why.
I am happily married with 2 babies, but she is the only other family I have. Our dad passed away when we were 17 and 19 and our mom has never really treated us the best and thinks we should worship the ground our partners walk on. I can’t lose her. She assured that she was calling her doctor first thing in the morning to get more of her medication but I wish there was something I could do for her. She has always been the stronger one growing up and has always defended me and had my back, but I don’t know what I can do. I have never seen her like this before. She has always been one to do things her own way and nobody could tell her different. He’s got her so beat down and it’s so hard seeing her this way. Please help."
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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):
The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.
"She has a few months to breathe and get her thoughts straight, she needs help and a lot of courage, but she has to leave and start the process of getting her life sorted and custody on her kids, she has custody by law, but she has to make sure they don’t have to go to their dad often as to not suffer abuse, good luck to you 2, you will have hardships together, but she can do it!!!"
"Definitely call her doctor stopping depression meds can be serious! With all the other things she is going through with her husband this could end badly. She needs to seek help right away."
"She needs to call her doctor and tell her/him what happened so she can get her meds, and take her boys and leave. It’s dangerous to stop medication cold turkey."
"Not sure where you live but she should be able to go to her pharmacy and they can give her some until she can see her doctor."
"Maybe talk her into going to counseling??? This is an extremely toxic relationship. She needs out. But unfortunately only she can make that choice."
"If he is in the Military he needs to be reported. They don’t allow spousal or child abuse. But if not she still needs her meds and to move on."
"Please help your sis to escape this relationship. Most towns have battered women’s services and even if she can’t go to a shelter they can counsel her or offer support groups. She can try to get new meds from the pharmacy or if not call her doctor."
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