My Mother is Telling People My Kid Is Autistic

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QUESTION:

"My mom has told multiple family members that she thinks my four-year-old is autistic. I know she doesn't view autism as a bad thing because my sister is on the spectrum and I don't view it negatively, but it's still bothering me that she's telling this to people? Should I bring it up to her and ask her to stop? I just feel like it's not her place to make judgments about my son let alone pass around those judgments but I'm also not sure if I'm wrong for feeling this way."

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TOP ANSWERS (AS SELECTED BY MODERATOR):

The following top answers have been selected by a moderator from hundreds of responses to the original question.

"I don’t think that’s her place especially if it is not confirmed by a doctor."

"Not her place no, but have you considered why she thinks that?"

"Even if he’s diagnosed it’s not her place to tell anyone. It’s your & your son’s business not hers. Maybe since having an autistic child she sees something you don’t. Talk to her. Ask her to stop telling people that. Also, ask her why she thinks he is."

"While your mom has no place to be doing this, since your sister is on the spectrum I’d get them evaluated. Though you should definitely have a talk with your mom as that’s not ok."

"She needs to stop regardless of any diagnoses. It is an attention thing for her."

"Say something to her. And if you don’t it’s def gonna keep bothering you and she’s not a mind reader so unless you state how you feel she’s not going to stop. Protect and stand up for your baby."

"Early testing gets better long-term results, BUT YOU DONT NEED TO SHARE. You said you have a sibling on the spectrum. She may see you things you don’t. No, she has no business giving her opinion. Ask her why? Then share your feelings"

"If it bothers you go speak with her."

"Sounds like attention-seeking behavior. I would ask why she is telling people that he is without being diagnosed by a professional."

"Do you have any concerns about your child? If yes, consult a specialist. What’s most important is not gossip or rumor, even a grandmother’s, but the truth. As a mother, you should be after that."

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