My fiance changed his phone password...thoughts?

So I went to get on my fiancés phone to go onto settings and try adding a family member to his family sharing thing for Apple Music and my fiancé has had the same passcode since we got together and when I went to open it it’s completely changed so it makes me a little suspicious as to why now… We are about to get married and I need somebody to give me positive answers as to why he would randomly change it and he won’t even let me know what it is anymore. I NEVER go through his phone or anything unless I ask first.


Maybe his planning something before or after the wedding and he doesn’t want you to know. Just a thought

Trust your gut. Communication is key.


Ask him for the new password. You’ll have your answer if he refuses to give it to u.

So me and the hubs know our passwords and have stayed the same for like ever. Even when I was planning his surprise party I would keep my phone on me all the time, when he tried to use it I told him no, he never questioned me. After the party I told him why I was being the way I was with it and he said “now it all makes sense”. I never changed it at all and he just went with it. It was the hardest part… I hope you talk with him and hope he opens up.

Maybe he changed it 6 months ago.

He’s planning a wedding surprise for you.

Have to admit I’d probably worry a bit but in saying that there may be something positive he’s trying to hide as in a surprise for you or something :woman_shrugging: something he doesn’t want you to see yet. Just trying to think positive


I’ve changed mine just because I felt like someone seen it that shouldn’t have it. Maybe it’s something simple like that.
But on the other hand, my ex husband used to change his all the time and he was totally cheating.

Probably best to ask him.


Ask him and have a conversation about it.

1 Like

Maybe it has a surprise for the wedding, before or after. And if he tells you it’s a surprise then you’ll know to expect something.


Legit could be nothing. If the password change is literally the only thing that’s happened that’s odd then just ask him for the new one to do what you were trying to do. If he acts weird then ask questions. Don’t jump straight to accusing if this is the only thing that’s standing out.

Um if he randomly changed it it’s called hidden something I would run now before anything

1 Like

Oh hontee. I know everyone is trying to give the benefit of the doubt, but run. If he didn’t have anything to hide, he would hand it over.

Honestly, you’re going to get a lot of mixed answers here, both good and bad. Your best bet is to just ask him about it.


Girl. You already know the answer :thinking:

Maybe he’s got information for your wedding gift in there and he doesn’t want U to see it. Maybe surprise plans for your honeymoon…
Who knows!
I would just ask him why and give him the benefit of the doubt.

1 Like

As ask him why he changed it and why you can’t have it
His answer will tell you what’s up and go from there
As it could be incocent and he has a lovely supprise for you before the wedding or that
Or could be something else but no point worrying over it till you ask him about it xx

Should of just asked him what the new password was. If he refused then you have your answer.

Go ahead get married…

If he changed his password and won’t tell you what it is then he’s hiding something.


Communication. If the 2 of you are about to get married, communication is necessity for that. If you haven’t already simply ask why the change in the passcode. Based on the answer or lack of, just go from there. It could be many things, good or bad, especially with an upcoming wedding. Start the convo opened minded not assuming or on the attack and he may be more receptive to providing an explanation. But regardless, effective communication is going to be key. Not just in this situation but many others as a married couple. Best of luck and hoping for a positive outcome for you!


If you can’t look that man dead in his eye and ask him why he changed his password… Don’t marry him.


Did u ask to go grab it this time?

It may be he has a surprise for you and didn’t think changing with out telling u would be an issue…… thinking if he told u he changed the password then it wouldn’t a surprise anymore :woman_shrugging::woman_shrugging: let’s hope it’s that and congrats on ur marriage


Why is this even a thing???

1 Like

Please don’t get married until he tells you why he’s done this.


Just ask him dont accuse him just calmly ask and let him no he can be honest


Says it all that you feel the need to ask the internet for answers ( complete strangers)…and not your future husband…that’s your red flag… you are to insecure for marriage…its on you for snooping, not him for changing HIS password!!


Maybe he’s planning a trip for y’all and wants it to be a surprise.
I’d just tell him you wanted to access the settings for the music family thing and see if he tells you the password or not.


If you’re about to get married, it could be that he has planned a surprise and doesn’t want you accessing his phone because it may ruin it.

If he’s never given you a reason to not trust him, don’t read too much into it.

Go with your gut. If he’s won’t tell you he’s hiding something

1 Like

You only want positive answers, but the real answer most likely isn’t positive :woman_facepalming:t3::+1:t2:

1 Like

Do you have a birthday or something coming up? Could be trying to do something nice, it’s not always sinister. Best to just ask

Doesn’t have to mean anything except he is grown and maybe needs one second of privacy. Never gets on his phone means you never get on it. Now you can’t say that anymore. If you can’t trust him get out now. I wouldn’t touch his phone for nothing, ever, no excuse.

If you NEVER go through his phone without permission, how did he not tell you he changed the passcode so you could share his apple music?


It could be something he is planning for the wedding, If I’m planning something and it’s in my phone I tell my gf that she can’t look at my phone untill “insert date” an accusation could lead to the wedding not happening so be carful but thorough.

Keep in mind that a lot of people are saying he is “hiding something” but that doesn’t always have to be a negative something… maybe he’s planning something special for you before the big day like a spa day or something and doesn’t want you to find out and ruin it for yourself… hiding something isn’t always just a red flag sometimes it can be he’s surprising you with something more than actually hiding something. Everyone is quick to look at the negatives, but remember sometimes there are positives and you know your partner best. Of his attitude around you is changing or things feel different then ask what’s going on but no relationship, married or otherwise survives without communication


This entire post and the comments are absolutely wild af!! :flushed::flushed::flushed::flushed:

Maybe he has a surprise planned for you???

Ask him first, if he doesn’t want to give it to you then that’s something to be suspicious about.


Married 30 years and never had any trust issues but just like my teenage boys and myself a phone is a personal and private thing. If you dont trust him then that’s already an issue that’s going to make for problems. If you feel he needs to be watched you may want to rethink a marriage. Now my hubby doesn’t even lock his screen and my boys would all give me theirs and have when I used their Facebook for games lol. They also know that I’m not going to open private messages or look at what they have. May have been different when they were younger, for safety reasons but cant remember a time it was necessary.

1 Like

Not a positive answer. He’s most likely cheating. I’d already be looking at how to get deposits back for all of the things wedding related.

If he’s not planning an amazing destination surprise hunny moon for you. Then he’s 100% cheating. I’d say you’re going out of town with a friend or something. Tiny Girls small bachelorette weekend. But don’t really go out of town. Wait to see where he goes. Or what he does. Maybe ‘someone’ ends up coming to the house. If you are on the same phone plan you can see phone records, there is a start.


If you’ve asked him for the new password and he won’t give it to you or explain why he changed it then something is definitely up!


Don’t assume anything until you talk to him. Communication is key in a healthy relationship, especially if you’re planning on marrying this man. We are strangers and don’t know you or your fiancée. Our opinions are irrelevant.


In my experience, this definitely means he’s cheating. Please do NOT marry this man.

1 Like

Maybe cause your going on it without even mentioning your going on it that’s just as much of an issue as him changing the password. Just because your getting married doesn’t give you the right to just use his phone or add people without saying something first


No because my husband has had the same password on his phone for literally like 7 years. I’d be highly suspicious if it all the sudden changed and he wouldn’t give it to me. I don’t check his phone or feel the need to but we have each other’s passwords regardless :woman_shrugging:


Am not being negative but why do you need to be using his phone for music you should already have in yours, you don’t need to be always using his phone to go into the apps… are you insecure yourself… he doesn’t need to explain it to you maybe he wants his privacy he could be tired of you always picking up his phone…if you love and respect him stop doing it …does he go into your phone a lot …don’t look for faults, trust him if you love him. But if you are having doubts about your wedding and looking for an excuse to cancel, do it properly don’t leave it too late for either of you.

If it was just to update, someone has seen the old, etc etc then fine. The fact he won’t tell you it is the red flag. He’s doing something he shouldn’t be.


So what. I change all my passwords ever so offten

Sorry but that’s a red flag :triangular_flag_on_post:


Did you ask him to go on his phone to add this family member to his Apple Music. Cause it sounds like ya didn’t.
Talk to your partner.

1 Like

So I always told my ex when I changed mine. It’s trust. So if I were you, run. This won’t be the last time. And it only messes with you mentally if you dwell on it and don’t leave

Wait… you went on his phone without asking OR you NEVER go through his phone or anything unless you ask first? Can’t be both.

THEN ASK HIM WHAT THE PASSWORD IS!!:woman_facepalming:t2:. If he makes it a big deal or doesn’t give it to you, then he has something to hide!!!

Red flag,there’s no reason to change his password and if he did why didn’t he give you the new password sorry very suss to me

1 Like

He could be hiding his vows so you don’t accidently find them

Brenda Coleman Roberson I’m trying to figure out why the said family member didn’t just ask him. Feeling like this is just an excuse to gain access to go through his phone.

Before getting married he may be getting some things out of his system. Best bet is to just ask for the new pass code and explain why you noticed/need it.


He’s hiding something. It seems strange he would let you know password then all of a sudden he changed it and won’t give you new one

Forced to change it maybe? Some programs and apps make you change passwords every so often.


If my wife changed the password on her phone my first reaction would not be that she was hiding something so if this is your first instinct I think that you need a bit more trust before getting married … the fact you’re asking the internet before him is also very telling .
He could have written his vows in his phone or something :woman_shrugging:t3:


You said he won’t give you the new one. Does that mean you asked? What else did he say about it?

More than likely cheating


That is very strange, especially when you’ve had access to his phone all this time and now suddenly it’s a secret and you’re not allowed to know it. Did he elaborate on why?
If your gut is telling you something is wrong, you’re probably right.
I’d be suspicious of him possibly cheating & I personally wouldn’t marry him until I got to the bottom of it.


Nothing positive to say about this. He’s hiding something unless your checking his phone constantly and he’s sick of that


You have no business on his phone. Especially changing anything. Sounds like you have a trust issue. Everybody needs privacy.


What did he say when you asked for the new password?? To much information missing girl


You gotta ask him CALMLY, and go from there. You can’t come to the internet before you have that conversation, all you’ll get is anxiety.

I just added my fingerprint when he wasn’t looking one day. He still hasn’t figured it out


Ask him. Pay attention to how he responds so you now if he’s lying.

I change my passwords every 3 months

Maybe his password was hacked and he had to change them.

Yall are getting married and you can’t have the pass code to his phone?? RED FLAG :triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post::triangular_flag_on_post:

Honestly, changing the password isn’t the suspicious part to me. People do that all the time. And some apps and websites recommend you do. The suspicious part to me is that he refuses to give it to you… I couldn’t look past that. Don’t accuse him, because it could be something he’s planning since you’re getting married soon. But I would communicate your feelings to him. If he gets angry or defensive, it’s a huge red flag. Don’t ignore it. But if you accuse him while communicating, don’t take it as a red flag immediately if he does get defensive or angry, because accusing someone of something that they may or may not be doing, will upset them. So I would calmly communicate with him about it, without accusing him. You are marrying him, you need to be able to communicate healthy . Or else it won’t last.


Maybe you should get premarital counseling and bring this up. You’re asking a bunch of total strangers about what we think YOUR man is up to. I bet after reading all of these answers your even more confused. You’re getting answers based on THEIR experience.

After we got engaged my fiancé changed his to the day he proposed. I thought it was sweet but it was also so he won’t forget the date :sweat_smile:

1 Like

You know your fiance,we don’t.The advice I would give is to talk to him about it and ask him why he changed it…If he refuses to give it to you,there is a reason for it…Either he doesn’t want you getting in his phone anymore,or he is hiding something from you…If you have asked him for the new password and he refuses to give it to you,then there is a reason for it…What it is,I don’t know,but it would make me believe he is hiding something…

Nothing positive about that… save a couple thousand now, down the road. Don’t get married. That’s clown shit.
People are disgusting and so sneaky. They’ll keep in contact with a ho while your right there in front of them.

I don’t think you will get many positive ideas here sorry these ladies can be a bit ruthless. How soon are y’all about to be married? Could he be making special wedding plans he’d want to surprise u with?

My fiance and I don’t have passwords period for our phones. Idc he gets on mine to look at stuff or play games I have he don’t. Or is he wants to see a conversation idc I leave my phone around. Nothing to hide. He is same with his but I don’t really go on his if he don’t have it one our kids do lol

Maybe he changed it because he’s tired of you doing stuff to his phone without asking him first. Why couldn’t he add the family member or decide if he wanted to?

Why were you going on his phone to add someone? My boyfriend doesn’t know my password partly bc he doesn’t care to remember it. But some ppl that’s the one source of privacy that they have

Don’t be so quick to think the worst. Could be many things. A surprise for you? Is it his employer? If he’s your fiancé he might be planning something special for you. I would just ask him about it. Most importantly do you have trust? If you do, trust the man. If you don’t, I’d question getting married.

Married for 13 years, together for 20. Husband is a pilot. I have zero worries and 100% trust and faith in my man.

Except you did go into his phone… Sorry but number one is trust. Not ok to try to enter his phone to “ add” contacts then use that as an excuse to become suspicious of him. If you are going to suspect him if cheating because you can’t get into a phone that isn’t yours do both you and him a favor and end it now. Life is too short for this.

Go on your gut feeling
Something is weird about this

If yall are having a wedding he might have a group chat with the guys and don’t want you to see

Just casually say”hey I tried getting on your Apple Music but couldn’t,did you happen to change your password”?

If you say hey, trying to access settings, what’s the new password and he doesn’t hesitate- you’re fine.


Carole Leblanc she stated he would give it to her. Still not enough info like what he said other than just he not giving her the password. So I do agree there is not enough info.

Considering you’re fixing to get married, maybe he’s planning something and it’s a surprise. Could he be up to something shady? Sure. But damn, not all men are cheating sleazeballs!

People on this group have a LOT of experience. 90% say that it doesn’t sound good. Are there any changes in his behavior. Ask why he won’t give you the new code. Promise that you won’t keep adding family members to his Apple Music. Observe what he’s doing to find signs of anything strange. Don’t set your wedding date yet.

I’d be walking out the house. If you are about to marry someone and you’re not doing nothing bad you would give the password.

You asked before you use his phone , yet you didn’t this time or he would of told you he changed the password. Adding friends , updating music , I’d be pissed if every time I went in my phone stuff kept changing. Should of just asked when it happened , now it looks like YOU aren’t trustworthy. Instead of everybody saying cancel the wedding …… look at both sides of this. This is what marriage is all about , not jumping to blame someone or point the finger or spread all your business. It’s about trust, love, truth, commitment, maybe you should step back till your ready.


Wow if you get upset over not knowing someones private password you should have never got married

Talk to him about it. Ask him if he changed it and if so, what is it? If he doesn’t want to share it with you then ask why not? Take it from there

Maybe he is preparing a surprise for you and the info about it is in his phone.

1 Like

Try to think positively, if hes never given you a reason to not trust him… don’t start now. Are you guys writting your own vows, maybe hes planning something for the wedding, convos about the wedding he doesnt want you to see bc its a surprise?

You already know why.
Time to leave.