My daughter is in 5th grade and wants to get her nails done for the first day of school…i am always getting cool acrylics and she wants to do the same…i want to let her do it but her dad will not let it happen because he thinks it is “too grown” for her…but she really really wants to do it…should i just take her behind his back?
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Help a mama out and respond anonymously on our forum. https://answers.mamasuncut.com/t/my-daughters-father-will-not-let-her-get-her-nails-done-advice/21116
I agree. She’s too young. Get her a manicure
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Get some dollar tree press ONS!
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That would be undermining him would it be ok for him to do this to you?
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Yeah take her just do them short It’s Okay Their Nothing wrong with doing Nails
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if she falls down while playing she could rip her whole nail off.
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She can get a nice mani and a cute design. She doesn’t need acrylics. I wouldn’t do it but that’s just my opinion. I didn’t let my daughter wear makeup either until she was a little older.
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Check your divorce papers. Mine say I have decision making when we disagree.
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Personally I’d say no to acrylics at that age but you could still take her for a mani and polish.
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Yeah. Wayyyy to young for acrylics. Just get her a manicure with regular polish.
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Way too young… Not to mention the DAMAGE acrylics do. 
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I definitely wouldn’t recommend bringing her to do anything behind his back… is that the kinda example you want to set? Try some negotiating 
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Let her get a nice gel manicure. My girls and I do gel manicures at home; they absolutely love them.
My oldest daughter is going in to 5th grade as well. I completely agree with your husband; she is too young for acrylics.
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Usually schools have a ‘uniform policy’ and she won’t be allowed them anyway
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Sheesh, why do we want our kids to grow up any faster??? Why doesn’t mom get her some fun color and give her daughter a manicure…bonding moment right there:purple_heart:
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As simple as this may seem, it’s not. Hey may or may not be over reacting and even if he is over reacting over something so small, doing it regardless can have consequences. It can put a wedge between your ability to co-parent. It can be a negative lesson for your daughter. All over some nails. Get em painted or somethin. She dont need all the extraness haha it aint that important
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Get her some cute press on ones instead, the ones with the sticky stuff on them. Of course talk about it with him first but maybe it’s a compromise that would work
Respect your husband or you will have endless problems
My daughter’s father and I let our daughter get them done for the end of the school year ceremony. I just made sure that they were short enough that if she would’ve fell or anything it wouldn’t have hurt her nails.
They destroy your nails… I definitely agree with him!!!
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Way too young for acrylics, plus they do so much damage to nails. Make a compromise, say no to fake nails but tell her she can get a manicure with some cool designs. Don’t go behind her dad’s back, that’s just teaching her it’s okay to go behind his back and yours as well.
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My kids dad was like that at first I just took her to get them done anyway and never ended up saying shit! 
She’s in 7th grade now and it’s just a normal thing
There’s nothing wrong with her getting her nails done! my daughter has been getting Hers done since she was in 3rd grade acrylic isn’t that bad.
You’re the mother. You can take her to her nails done. He doesn’t get to make the choices for everything 
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Are you talking about getting her acrylics or a manicure? I think a manicure with a cute design shouldn’t be an issue but if you’re thinking acrylics, you’re nuts!
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They’re not allowed in school anyway are they
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We let my daughter get acrylics in 4th grade. We just had them do them SHORT. Maybe see if it’s ok if you do them SHORT??
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I would let her get her nails painted like shellac instead of acrylics on them.
Do not go behind his back that is very disrespectful
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Don’t do it behind his back….Try just Shellac fist! I’m 45…done the acrylics…long time…now all i do is shellac…it’s so much easier on the nail…have 3 girls…Shellac is what she needs! No damage done!
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As a general rule of thumb, anything you have to take her to do behind his back is probably not a great idea. How would you feel if he did something you were very clearly against? Idk, I’d try and find a compromise. Take her for a normal mani or something.
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No you should not go behind his back. That’s really petty over fingernails. It’s a small battle and I think dad should win this one. It’s coming from care not spite. Maybe next year.
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Should i just take her behind his back lol sounds like dads tryna prevent the kid from becoming like her mama
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They mess up nails under… o.O
Acrylics are very damaging, but why not get her a beautiful manicure?
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She should be allowed to get her nails don’t for crying out loud.
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I agree with him. Acrylics so young? Why?
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I mean I personally feel like 5th grade is too young for acrylics and also it’s never a good idea to "go behind his back " that’s his child also
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Why not take her with you when you get your nails done instead of getting acrylics just letting her get her nails painted I used to do that with my daughter and she was just as happy
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As a mom and a licensed nail tech, I’m with the dad on this one. Too young for acrylics, not because it’s “too grown” but because of the damage it can cause and the chemical exposure.
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Let her try press on or glue ons first. She may not like it. But yall can still have a momma and daughter spa day without her getting acrylics. Me and my daughter that was also in 5th grade did that. I got the acrylic and she got gel.
I don’t really think she’s too young, why would there be an age on it especially if they are really short, but let her try other options first in case she doesn’t like it.
As far as her father goes I wouldn’t go behind his back but just you and her talk to him about why she wants it. And if anything make it a Christmas or birthday present
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Grade 5? 11 years old?? Umm thats too young maybe regular manicure or shellac? 
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Her dad Is 
she is a child and acrylic isn’t for her at this stage in her life…going behind his bk I’d gonna open a can of worms you’re not ready for
Maybe instead of acrylics she can get a gel manicure? Or dip powder manicure?
No Her nail beds will be damaged and she should wait for Prom or 16th b day. Just get her a mani Pedi for her own nails
Or better yet…do it for her
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Absolutely NOT showing respect for his choices when it comes to her is a big deal. Would you want him to disregard your feelings and opinions on raising your daughter and just did whatever he thought was best. My guess is no. He is her father just like your her mother and y’all should respect each other’s feelings/decisions!
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My mom let me have glue on ones at that age for special occasions but I didn’t get acrylics till after 16
Sally press on nails…they are fancy and look like u got them done in the salon…the glue will let her keep them on for 3 days
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I would take her to get a nice manicure…a nail polish in her favorite color…but I would advise against acrylics…they cause a lot of damage.
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Maybe just get her nails painted instead of acrylics.
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I’m old school and would agree with dad. They grow up so fast as is, no need to rush them. Nice manicure but that’s it.
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I wouldn’t take her behind his back. Respect how he feels. Because That’s his daughter too.
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Get Shellac done . It’s a very hard type of gel nail polish that mimics acrylic but not harmful like them .
To young for fake nails yet
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It’s perfectly fine to do her nails. I wouldn’t go behind his back but I certainly would tell him how I feel about it.
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Let her get a manicure. No acrylic nails she’s to young.
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A nice manicure with a color she likes at this age.
I would hold off on acrylics until late teen years. Even my nail lady says she won’t do them unless they are 16. Polish should be sufficient enough for now.
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Just get some pretty nail polish put on. Acrylics will ruin her nails. Especially for one who is still growing.
The amount of damage it does to adult nails, I’d never let my child get it done until much older. It took my nails almost 6 months to not be brittle and a 5th grader has thinner nails then that. Go buy the cute little press ons. It’s alot safer. Besides, maybe then she will realize that maybe it’s not for her without the damage
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Why not get the stick on ones from the dollar store u can get really cool ones with cool designs that way if she wants them off in a few days they will come off easy
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To young acrylics ruin the natural nail get her press on with sticky tabs
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No. Honor his wishes. My day wouldn’t let me wear make up or date until I was 16 I’m better for it
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Dip nails or gel polish would be okay. But fake nails isn’t for her age group.
I wouldn’t do acrylics but get her nails done, and call it a compromise. I wouldn’t undermine him, it’s not like he’s wrong on this.
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Take her and get a nice manicure, she’s too young for acrylics
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Acrylics are horrible for your nails. If you like them sure go ahead but as far as a child no. A manicure and polish she likes is perfect.
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Nothing for acrylic. Painted yes but not acrylic that’s for grown ups
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Compromise, pretty manicure but I’d hold off on the acrylics. Maybe less harmful short-midlength press-ons.
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Absolutely not she is way too young to start that take her to a psychiatrist if that’s what she wants
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My friend got acrylics that young and ended up ripping her whole nail and fake nail off in gym class personally I would not allow acrylics that young also they cause a lot of damage to the nail
I also wouldn’t go behind the dads back how would you feel if he went behind your back on something you said no to? It’s teaching your daughter that she doesn’t have to listen to him or respect his wishes which isn’t fair you both need to be on the same page
A manicure with just polish or shellac is what I think is age appropriate or the press ons with out the glue but that’s just my opinion
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What about using colorstreet nail strips? The last 2 weeks and have many different colors, glitters and designs to choose from like you would if you went to a salon and so much cheaper. You take the nail strips off with regular acetone nail polish remover.
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Maybe try shellac ? So she is still getting them done but without the look of fake nails ?
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If you are allowing her to go behind her dad’s back then I shall say her dad most likely will say in the long run it’s not good to hide things from your parents maybe get her Dollarama nails with sticky press on
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No, just paint the natural nail. How is a 5th grader who’s never had the nails going to write her name is she isn’t used to them. Teach her she’s already beautiful and she doesn’t need nails to enhance her.
Secondly about your daughters father. If your with him, and you ask this? You ain’t going to be together for long. Relationships are built on trust.
If your not with him, then parenting is teamwork, and breaking that team work only fucks up the team, and your daughter will most definitely suffer the most as a result of fighting parents.
So, is starting a war far bigger than just nails, worth it?
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I’d start with the press on ones for now
Have u guys discussed a compromise on maybe letting her do a regular manicure and having her chose a nail color dip and design she likes instead? Acrylics are so damaging. They also have the gel nail polish now too. There are a lot more safer, better and more age appropriate options than acrylics these days?!
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Acrylic nails are a want not a need. It’s an expensive habit that destroys the natural nail underneath, there is no need to start such a habit. A plain pedicure and manicure is wonderful treat.
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So your 11/12 year old really really wants something that will damage her nails and you immediately jump to going behind your husband’s back?
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Take her behind his back?! No. Absolutely not. Honor his wishes and uphold his opinion to his daughter even you don’t agree. Ie- “it’s ok if you don’t agree (insert child’s name) but your dad has made his stance clear. I will talk to him more about your side but for now we need to respect his answer…. “
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I don’t jump in on these usually but holy freaking crap the fact that you’re even asking a bunch of strangers online if you should go behind your spouse’s back over something so trivial is mind-boggling.
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You would go behind your husband’s back for this? Really?
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What about some cool press ons
I mean; I started to let my daughter get acrylics in the 5th Grade but not all the time and no longer than a 2 in length
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There is AWESOME press ONS…
But i don’t think he’s be ok with them either.
Maybe something appropriate for her age not to grown up looking…
I mean, he is her dad but it’s a girl thing come on! Harmless
I would maybe do the dip powder or gel rather than acrylic.
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Can you compromise with some gel nails? Let her get the long lasting design and avoid conflict with her father until you guys can sit down and resolve the issue?
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No. I’m sure she can wait. Respect dad. I’m sure you would want the same.
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First think your in your 30’s and how much do you pay for your nails a month? 100-200$ so that would be a grown up thing. And if you get her accustomed to having them at 9 you are also committing to pay for them until she is either working or who knows. Which is fine except teaching kids to save for things like that is hard when you already paid for them for so long. And if she breaks one or takes them off after a day (6girls been there done that) you either wasted your money or now have a total panic to deal with especially if you can’t get her in to fix it right away and she breaks it before the first day of school.
Get a gel manicure. It will also strengthen her nails during wear so when she gets it done again her nails will be longer each time.
Or buy her the gel kit and do it with her. I did it made it way easier. Be glad they are cheap now. It was like 300$ but worth it back then.
Hugs girls are fun. Tell her 14 but yes to gel mani petty
Don’t give her that kind of insecurity yet
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And what will that teach your 5th grader if you go behind her fathers back?
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Yeah don’t go behind his back and do it because for one how would you feel if he took her and done something you’re uncomfortable with behind your back? Second of all your teaching her it’s okay not to listen to what her dad says next will be what you say doesn’t go. Maybe compromise on regular nail polish I think she’s still a little young for acrylics.
When my mom goes to get her nails done she takes my 5 year old and they paint her nails and do a cute little character or flower just with nail polish. I think that’s something appropriate for her age. Your daughter is still in elementary there’s no need for nails in that grade especially with recess and everything.
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Just get them painted. But I don’t recommend doing it behind his back. Could cause issues in the long run.
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Personally there is no way in hell I’d let a child that young get her nails done. Ridiculous. If she wants nails get her the kiddo stick on kind. I really don’t see the dad having an sending issue with those.
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Can you IMAGINE if he went behind your back on something you said no to?
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I agree with your husband…
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Co parent!!! Idk how you think it would be ok to go behind his back , respect his wishes as you would want him to respect yours . She’s in 5th grade not high school I understand why he isn’t down with the acrylics just yet .
Can you compromise and get her a manicure with nice painted nails for the experience? Instead of Acrylics?
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Angela Jolene Hart only nails was mentioned…She never said he made choices for everything…Getting her nails polished is one thing…He has a problem with acrylics…You also just don’t go behind your spouses back
I think going behind his back would a horrible decision! If he did that to you how would you feel? It isn’t right and it’s also teaching your daughter a horrible lesson. Amazon, shein, so many places have gorgeous press on that are more suited for her age. To add, acrylics will give her nail damage from a young age. Maybe just pass on them and buy some cute press ons!
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I’m on him with this one… So many other options like nail polish, nail stickers, gel nails for kids.
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Nope… she is far too young. Her nail bed is too weak to put acrylics on. She is what 11? Stop trying to make her think she needs to alter herself for some standard of beauty.
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