soo my daughters dad(30 years old) was dating this chick(30 years old) for like 8 months they moved to Florida together and they broke up like last month. In the 8 months they were together this girl was involved in everything when it came to our daughter and had to be involved in stuff when me and my daughters dad had to talk about our daughter. She always had to be there when he FaceTimed our daughter or when he and I were just talking about our daughters well being. I always had to be on speaker and all that. The girl wanted to even be in the group chat we have with his sister and his mom. I knew when he was texting me and when she was texting me from his phone. the girl disrespected me and got nasty with me when him and I were talking about our daughter. She accused him of cheating and then he kicked her to the curb. So then today one of me and his mutual friends told me that he and the girl got back together. He didn’t tell me so I texted him and I was like is there like something you need to tell me about the crazy girl? and he goes oh yeah we got back together she apologized. I was like over my damn dead body is this girl gonna be around my kid ! No questions no if ands or buts don’t care don’t wanna hear it… and he goes I know she has issues but I wanna give her a second chance . I’m like she showed her true colors in the 8 months you two were together. He goes I know I won’t risk anything or won’t let anybody risk me from seeing our daughter so I know what I need to do. I’m just like why would you even put yourself through that again? he was so down in the dumps when they were together. He was so depressed. just why do men put themselves through that? I think he just will be with anyone so he’s not lonely.
Firstly, this story was incredibly hard to follow. Secondly, it’s not your place. You are divorced. It doesn’t sound like she is mean to your child just not the best partner for you ex, but once more not your issues
All I read here is reasons you don’t like her, and things she did to you. I see nothing about her mistreating your daughter. So how is he risking his relationship with her exactly?
Your daughter is half his too, if he wants his girlfriend to be apart of his daughters life then he has the right to make that decision, JUST LIKE YOU DO. He can involve her in those phone calls, birthdays, holidays, school events, ect… it’s his right. Your best bet is to get over yourself and build the best co-parenting relationship possible, even if it means with the two of them. And remember what happens between the two of them is their business, not yours. If it doesn’t involve or doesn’t harm your child then it doesn’t concern you. (Assuming she’s not a child abuser or a druggie)
If you keep your child from him because he chooses to be with a woman you disapprove of, you definitely have issues and probably shouldn’t be the custodial parent. Do what’s best for your daughter, momma!
Absolutely not your place to say who he can and can’t be with. And also not your choice if she is around your daughter on his hours providing there is no court order stopping her. Back off a bit, you don’t need to be getting involved in his relationship, if she’s crazy and doesn’t trust him, that’s his problem not yours.
How is he risking his relationship with his daughter? Is there anything about this woman that makes her a dangerous person, like criminally or drug wise? If not, then it’s not really your place. Is your child in any danger around her? If not, then you need to let it go about him being with her. If it makes you uncomfortable about her being involved in the coparenting aspect of it, that is a boundary you need to set with him. As a on and off again girlfriend, I agree she doesn’t need to be involved in y’all’s conversations. But to say y’all’s daughter can’t be around her when she isn’t a legitimate threat, is a step too far. And if you refuse to let him have whatever time he does get with y’all’s child because she is around, that is alienating behavior.
That’s not your place. As long as your child isn’t in danger then you need to stay out of it and if your child is in danger you call DCF and move forward that way legally.
Sorry it’s not your business. If he wants to date her that’s his choice. The court will say the same thing. unless your daughter is endanger. No where in this post says anything about your daughter’s life at risk. All I hear is you complaining about the girlfriend. It sounds like you are still not over him. Honestly, if damage is done between your daughter and her father you would be responsible for not allowing her around him because of her. You need to go to counseling.
Honestly…its none of your business, I know it’s not what you want to hear, but the reality of the situation is his relationships with other women no longer should concern you.
If he moved to another state for a new girlfriend, it sounds like he doesn’t care about having a relationship with his daughter anyway. Nothing you can do about who he chooses to date. If he chooses a relationship with a controlling freak over a relationship with his own daughter, that’s his choice. It sucks, but you can’t make him be a good dad.
It’s really none of your business who he’s with or how he’s chosing to be treated. As long as she isn’t hurting your child then that’s all that matters. If she’s not endangering your child then you have no right to care who he’s dating. If you don’t want her to be involved in the parenting aspect of your child then have that conversation but either way he can date whoever he wants.
My daughter’s father and I have a 3 month rule. While I’ve been in a long term relationship for the past 5 years, he’s bounced around quite a bit. He’s actually only had one gf last over 3 months, at that time he introduced her to our daughter and me at the same time. Although I am very grateful he respects my wishes on this, he has every right to have whoever he chooses around our daughter during his parenting time. It’s unfortunate you have to deal with a crazy gf, but you have no say so on who he dates and what he deems appropriate in a relationship. Until your daughter expresses any issues with her, I’d stay out of it. Without making a scene and causing more issues by trying to demand she’s not around or withholding your daughter from her dad. Let it all play out naturally and run its course.
You can’t control who your EX is dating, you also can’t control who your EX brings around his and your child when said child is there
You’re one of those moms I fuss about that I tell my ex husband to go ask his buddies about how their kids mom are.
Okay, let me ask you this. Is she beating your daughter? Is she doing drugs that you know without a doubt? Is she an alcoholic? If the answer is no to those then you have no say so. You can’t control who he is with just because you don’t like her being on the messages, video calls etc. If you keep him from his daughter all because you don’t like the girlfriend then you need to seek therapy and with a quickness. That is not a reason for you to keep her from her dad. Their relationship is their business unless it enterferes with ya’lls daughter health.
Where him and his girlfriend set boundaries in their personal life is nobody’s business. You realize the ONLY “negative” thing you said was that she wants to be INVOLVED? How awesome for your daughter to have another support person in her corner! You sound like you have not moved on from the relationship and forgot you are not in a position to have a say in what goes on in his life. And to threaten his relationship with his daughter is a dirty low move to make. A child is not a bargaining tool.
This is none, not will it ever be any of your business in whom he does and does not date. If she’s not harming your daughter, mistreating your daughter or abusing her in any way, then there’s absolutely nothing you can do. Stop trying to control the situation because it doesn’t involve you. Encourage the daughter/father relationship. If he messes up and wants to date a crazy woman then it’s on him. But don’t take away his rights as a father because you don’t approve of the women he dates.
Unfortunately it doesn’t get to be your business. If they’re putting the daughter in harms way then step in. But until then you’re gonna have to deal with it. With any luck he’ll see the true colors again and they’ll break up. But that’s for him to decide. You don’t get a say.
Sounds like you are just jealous… It isn’t any of your business who he is with and it’s not your choice on whether or not you approve of her… 
It’s really none of your business what he does or why, you can’t use your daughter for an excuse for everything. He’s a grown man & he’s gonna live his life the way he wants to. Her acting insecure is also none of your business. I’m not sure how he’s putting his relationship with his daughter at risk, you’re the one doing that by trying to use her as a weapon against him. Women who do that are desperate & pathetic. & I’ve seen it so many times. Go on with your life & stop worrying about his problems. He’ll figure it out. He also shouldn’t have to kiss your ass to see his daughter.
I’m confused as to how he is risking his relationship with his daughter by being with this woman?!
Unless she is a danger to the child, you have zero say in his relationship. If he is a good dad, then you trust his judgement on who he chooses to have his child around.
As far as the girlfriend all up in the parenting business, that’s the only thing that you have a say in. You can set the boundary that communication about the child is directly between you and him and and you can enforce that boundary by letting him know that you will disconnect any phone calls or FaceTimes if she jumps in. But honestly, all I read were your issues with the girlfriend. Nowhere did you state any mistreatment of the child by the girlfriend.
Your WAY out of line. The only risk of a torn relationship with his daughter is you. Your to invested in his personal life and girlfriend. Grow up. If he’s a good father why does it matter to you if they got back together.
Is this the same Dad that moved to Florida and wanted to wait a year before he saw his child. If so, I don’t think you will have a problem. She won’t be visiting him anytime soon. Also, not your business who he is with unless that person is a danger to your daughter.
It’s not your business 
My advice is to try & have some kind of relationship with this woman. She obviously doesn’t trust him, that’s why she wants to be involved with all the phone calls & chats. But that part is none of your business, as long as it’s not affecting your daughter. That’s on them. I have 4 step children. 2 different baby mamas. 2 are grown & make their own decisions. The other 2 are 10 year old twins. I have a great relationship with both moms. Its made life soooo much better that we all get along. I had to put some differences aside in the beginning (as I’m sure they did too) & realize it’s not about me, my husband, or the BMs. It’s about the kids. Offer an olive branch (& mean it) & put the ball in her court. That’s a good starting point to all work together.
Women do the same thing only worse. If she butts in on your conversations, and he doesn’t tell her to butt out, then you do it. Tell her this is none of her business and see what they do. See if she really wanting to work on their relationship or needing a place to stay
Coming from experience going through this with my daughters dad you don’t have much of a say. you can of course tell him how you feel about it but what he does is all up to him. If he wants to be with someone who is crazy then so be it. As long as she isn’t hurting your child or putting anything into her head or acting like she’s her child let it run it’s course. Hopefully he will learn that she isn’t worth it and that he deserves better.
She sounds incredibly unhinged… but unless your daughter’s safety is in jeopardy, you gotta live and let live.
You don’t have to allow her into YOUR space when you’re having a face to face conversation with your ex but she’s gonna be around him regardless. On the phone, text etc. Nothing you can do.
You can’t control who he dates or who he brings around both of your children. So long as she isn’t abusive to the children, mind your own business and trust him to be the other parent to your child.
Obviously she was a narcissist and she always will be. He’s obviously trauma bonded to her which is why he went back to her. Also there’s nothing you can do unless you get a judge saying in a court order that the girlfriend cannot be near or in the same place as your daughter. The only person who will risk his relationship with his daughter is you if you ever prevent him from seeing his daughter just because u don’t agree with who he’s with. You need to ask yourself though does she put your daughter in danger? Is your daughter safe with her being around etc. okay if not then you’ll need to figure out the next steps
If this woman is not dangerous to your daughter, mind your business.
I can understand from a point of not wanting anyone in and out of your daughters life but that wasn’t even a concern of yours here.
Why do you make it your business
It actually is non of your business. But I do understand how you feel.
Do not play games with your childs life. If he is supporting her and sees her than you have no right to het involved. The girlfriend at this stage Do not have a day over your child and there is no need for her to be involved in conversation but do be considerate towards their feelings and relationship. Even if you still care about his feelings and life.
Okay…let me just say this…everyone seems to be coming at you saying it’s not your business, but nobody is backing you by saying your relationship with him concerning your daughter IS NONE OF HER BUSINESS either. She doesn’t need to be in on conversations between the two of you.
That being said, you just have to grin and bare it with her. Until he opens his eyes and gets away from the toxic relationship they have. You can’t control what he does and if it will effect the relationship between father and child. If he screws that up, that’s on him. You just have to be her support when he does. Co-parenting is not easy.
You are way too involved in their relationship… WHY? He is not you business anymore, your daughter is it sounds oike you are too invested in his romantic life
Hahaha you sounds like a bitter baby mama🙄. Do you listen to yourself. I mean how old are you?. His relationship is non of your business, who is he with is non of your business. You tried to control everything that goes on in his life. Makes me wonder if you make all these up for people to feel sorry for you. Grow tf up
Honey !! You are not in charge of his personal life, he can be with whoever he wants and there’s nothing you can do. Their relationship should not matter to you, the only thing that should is the way she treat your daughter
Same reason women do the same darn thing. Sad…
You can’t get involved in his relationship but you can get a court order stating that she’s not to be involved in your & your ex’s parenting. If you’re talking to him & he puts you on speaker say “I will only talk to you, our child’s parent. Call me when you’re able to talk.” Then hang up. Same with video calls. If your daughter is talking to dad, gma or aunt & she has to be there tell them that they can call her again when she’s not interfering.
You sound very controlling & jealous! Let him do & see who he wants, he’s your EX!!!
Sounds like you’re a little jealous
It’s really not your place to say who he can and can’t be in a relationship with. His daughter is 1/2 his, and he has a right to see her. Why is he risking his relationship with his daughter? You do not get to rule your exs life and choose who he’s with. Grow up
Start sending him info on narcissistic WOMEN. There is plenty about narc men out there. Sounds like he is being mentally abused and she hoovered her way back in.
The girl is toxic but if that’s who he wants to be with then that’s his choice. Let him be and just keep her away from your daughter
His personal life has nothing to do with you but I totally get not wanting her reintroduced to instability.
No one just meets my kid just like that. Those kids ain’t gotta break up with everyone you break up with. She sounds rude and intrusive, don’t know boundaries.
IDK why people like bringing temporary people around their kids.
Tell me you have control issues without saying it