My boyfriend got a text from a girl at 3 in the morning: Advice?

If he came in at 3:30 am why did he feel the need to shower??

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So been there hunny… he might not have cheat yet but he will. Him deleting the text is a way to still talk without you knowing. And at this point he has been doing stuff like this for a while. Sorry I know how hard it can be with kids involved but you have to decide what your next step is going to be.

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If yall have a kid and one on the way he really doesn’t have any business going out all night long anyways that right there is a huge red flag. Also if the message was about a jacket why was he deleting them?

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Download snoopza on his phone.

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He’s hiding something. If it was innocent he wouldn’t of deleted some of it.

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How did she get his number

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Why did he for one go out with another girl while is girlfriend mother of his child is at home, and u said he came in and slept on the couch??? And he’s receiving messages from other girls, umm that’s how it all starts and usually when one cheats they make the other person seem like their crazy! Follow ur heart girl! Ur not crazy!

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Something is definitely up.

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Trust your gut honey! It’s fishy plain and simple no honest man has half of his messages deleted!!! Whatever you choose to do with him is your choice but just remember they guy definitely has some secrets you may never know about. His buddies are not your buddies!

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Keep the girls # and call her see what she has to say.

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Message the girl yourself and confront her about it if you think he isn’t being honest or have a valid explanation, as you’re the mother of his kids and he lives with you? I’d assume? You’ve got a right if so

Just remember is she messaged him. He gave her his number. If they were together, he told her where to meet him.

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And first of all, why is he sleeping on couch?

hes cheating no reason to delete messages if he has nothing to hide

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If you message her… ask if she found her jacket???

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He was on the couch Bc he didn’t wanna wake u up. And half of the messages was deleted Bc he is obviously hiding something from you!! Everything about this post is WRONG!!!

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Throw the whole damn thing out. :roll_eyes:

Why does she even have his number…
It’s obvious what’s happening. Is there someone that was at the supposed house that you can ask if your partner was actually there? Or next time he goes there just rock up and see if he is actually going there or to the chick’s house

If he is deleting texts then it’s not innocent and he deleted them because he didn’t want you to see. SHADY get to the bottom of it.

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Girl he’s cheating. Leave.

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Counter point to everyone else: could it be the friends that he’s hanging out with that you don’t trust, not necessarily him? His buddies could’ve given her his number and she was asking about something she was looking for before he left asking if he had seen it. Pregnancy hormones are real, I would get mad at my hubby for breathing. Take a second to reflect on if you have had issues previously or if this is a new thing that has you insecure and blown up with everything going on in your body. He could’ve been home at 3:30 and slept on the couch because he thought he might wake you getting into bed because your uncomfortable. Think it through and talk to him about how that group makes you feel. If he cares he will set up boundaries for being home at a certain time and stick to it.

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Eh. If its deleted, he has something to hide. That’s just it.

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Id kick his teeth in lol

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She’s texting… he showered and slept on the couch… girl you are not stupid

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You already know the answer. Don’t just let this one go. You know he’s done wrong!

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Go with your gut. If you feel as though something isn’t right 9/10 you’re probably right. There’s absolutely NO good reason for someone to be texting him that late

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Oh girl he’s hiding something there is a chance he probably cheated

Us women usually have pretty good instincts follow yours!

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He wouldn’t be hiding it if he didn’t do something wrong. Personally considering you are together and having baby #2 I don’t think he should be hanging out at friends with other women and putting himself in that situation.

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He slept on couch because he probably came home later than he was supposed to and didn’t want to wake you up.

Trust your gut. Be prepared to be told your over reacting crazy controlling or jealous. You are not.

I agree :heart:He needs to take care of his wife and family nit party like he was a teenager with no responsibilities​:hot_face:

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What is it that you want from him. Since he is doing what he wants, why aren’t you included with his friends?

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How they can look a person in th eff face and lie. …is something I will NEVER NEVER NEVER Be able to comprehend…
He has to leave…not YOU.!

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He is hiding something

He cheated on you with said girl so tell him to leave and you take care of you and the children this will not get better he wants to be caught trust me l packed mine up put everything in his truck and said give me back the house key and leave l wished him well

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He’s guilty. Red flags. Showered, slept on the couch, texts deleted…

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If you are questioning your sanity girl get out of there…because what these ladies are saying are facts. Something is Definitely not right and I’ve been in your situation and I was pregnant…this is what I did lol…I texted her…and I saved as much proof as possible so when I confronted him I had what I needed to let him know he’s the crazy one. Prayers for you :heart:

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There is no reason to delete a conversation with someone unless he’s hiding something. Trust your instincts if you’re feeling some type of way…

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Nope there is bad vibes all over this situation! If it was deleted then he is hiding something he doesn’t want you to see trust me I’ve been there… lies and more lies!

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There’s no reason for him to delete the convo if he isn’t hiding anything :thinking:

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Don’t accuse yet but keep your eyes and ears OPEN!

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You already know the answer. Probably isn’t the first time either. Kids or not. It’s not going to get any better. Trust your gut.

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Call the damn chick.
Or I would follow him. Get the proof you need so you don’t think your going “crazy” and if he is cheating leave his damn ass! Good luck

I’m really sorry but I do believe there is something going on. Maybe contact her and ask her directly. It’s a very sad situation to be in especially with children involved. I hope you solve this dilemma with little to no heart break

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I’m crazy I would of texted her flirting told her to meet up pretending to be him if she shows thats your proof he cheated. Thats just me though :woman_shrugging:

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Also I’ve been in your exact shoes pregnant boyfriend going out with “the guys” not coming home till super late showering sleeping on the couch turns out he was cheating on me sleeping at another women’s house. Not to sound rude but he’s definitely cheating if he wasn’t half the messages wouldn’t be gone if he had nothing to hide.

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If it’s deleted he’s hiding something

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Dont be shy pretend to be him and text back

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Confront her face to face if she acts awkward then you no somethings up.

If there half the convos missing then I be suspicious I know my husband and he does the same

Sorry but this story is fishy … it reeks of stink ! :disappointed_relieved:

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Dump his ass!!! No time for bullshit, lying or games. He aint got no business being out till 3 am or sleeping on “someone’s couch” and little chicky got his number FROM HIM need i say more???

He cheated 100%. Don’t humiliate yourself by calling her or texting her. You should’ve taken a picture of the shady texts with your phone to keep as a record if you ever do decide to leave him, and things end up in court. Love yourself enough to walk away from a man who clearly has no respect for you or your children. I know it may be easier said than done, but you deserve better!

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Girl he is cheating. End of story. He was cheating, she misplaced something while they were around each other and texted him to see if he knew where it was. That’s that. Now are you gonna move on or are you gonna forgive him? That’s the only question that needs to be asked. Stop going in circles picking your brain trying to figure out what is what.

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Deleted means guilty.

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Get her number and ask her

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Your gut feeling is probably correct. You don’t delete things mid conversation unless you’re hiding things.

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Trust your instincts

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Why delete the message :see_no_evil: I would 100% think something straight away with the deleted message, if it’s her jacket then why delete that part ? Very strange I would be fishy too, message the girl if she’s a nice girl she will be able to explain to a pregnant lady what she needs to know , not just what you need to hear from the male :woman_shrugging:t4:

To me…it seems like you already know youre answer… don’t let it ruin you. Either get all the facts straight… and move on together. Or competently move on yourself, and child/ren. Honestly I stuck around for my ex,/childs dad. And I would never ever ever again I wasted so much time. In misery, trying to fix everything. I was a total mess. All over. Good luck and hope everything turns out for you.

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Never make yourself feel crazy trying to find innocence in a man that’s clearly doing wrong I’m not saying he’s cheating I’m not saying he’s doing anything but the simple fact that half the conversation is gone is bad news

Call her and ask! Woman up. It’s obvious they boned down!

What if you came home smelling of smoke? I would shower. What if a guy was bothering you and sent you something inappropriate? I would delete it

That is so true that her boyfriend is not being honest to his girlfriend an they are expecting there 2nd baby

Sorry hun but he did a dirty on you… just straight out ask if he cheated…if he’s hiding shit he’s up to no good

How do you know he deleted the messages?

I honestly wouldn’t call her. She prolly knows about you and if something is going on… chances are she will cover for him. Texting a 3 am to the opposite sex should always be a red flag. Nothing good ever comes over if that.

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In my past experience, go with your gut. If it looks like a duck, walks Like a duck, quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck… after being in an extremely verbally abusive and manipulating relationship for 8 years, & having 2 kids with a man I was incredibly in love with and invested in, all the signs of cheating were there, but I refused to believe what was right in front of my face because my heart couldn’t handle it. You’re feeling that way because you’re right. People don’t delete messages that are innocent, and random women don’t text your man’s phone at 3 in the morning if it’s innocent. Don’t be as naive as I was and make big decisions with your heart instead of your brain. I left my children’s father two years ago and there are still parts of me that are healing from the trauma that I’ve been through. It has been the most difficult, however the best decision that I’ve ever made. The longer you stay, the more trauma you have to heal from… I have serious trust since being with him. Every time I start to get close to someone and I see the tiniest red flag, I push them away. I’m afraid to let anyone get close to me because I don’t want to look like a fool like I did for 8 years before. I’m a single mother of a four-year-old and a seven-year-old, and mom guilt and the desire to be with my children 24/7 prevents me from being in another relationship. There are some wounds that never really heal fully, and this will be one of them for me because he is the father of my children and I’ll always have to have contact with him in one form or the other. Like I said before, and in no way am I trying to paint your picture to look like mine because I have no faith in any man anymore, but you yourself said that half of the conversation was deleted, and this woman texted your man at 3 in the morning. Any real man wouldn’t be out until 3 in the morning when his pregnant wife or girlfriend is at home unless he was working anyway. You know in your heart what the answer is otherwise you wouldn’t have gone to the internet to confirm it.

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Always trust your gut. It’s usually right. Just watch and observe. Act like you know nothing. The truth always comes out

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Something is fishy thats why you are on here asking questions not sure but I’d go with your gut

When there are things deleted…There is dishonesty!!!
If there was nothing going on, He wouldn’t have hidden the rest of the conversation!!

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If he is deleting the messages, then that’s because he’s hiding something. Why delete the message if nothing is going on.

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Girl go straight to the number and ask her :joy: sounds sketch to me

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Keep watching his phone, you’ll learn more than you want to.

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You’re pregnant with another child at home and Covid is still out there and he’s doing what???

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If he deleted any part of it he’s hiding something

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Textbook cheating babes, and you dont deserve that shit. I’d get out now, no honest man is staying out till 3 am with his pregnant girl and baby at home, AND having random females text at all hours of the night. My bet, is he wasn’t even with friends to begin with…

Depending on what cell company u have go up there and ask for a print out of all the texts messeges sent out from the girls number it will show u everything. My mom did this to my younger sister when she lied and had the printed out copies I’m sorry but it was hilarious to watch her lie and then get quiet when the copies came out

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Cheating… deleting things and sleeping on the couch… definitely hiding something.

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How did she get his # anyway! I would definitely go with your gut!

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Ask him to call her in front of you and ask her if she found her ‘’jakcket’’, just the way she’ll answer the call will tell you everything

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So your trusting him around other ladies sleeping at his friends while you’re at home pregnant? Finding him messages that he deleted so you wont catch him then she might replied back to him again while he was sleeping. You should not trust it’s too much confidence

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You are pregnant and he should not be mixing in a environment with as you said so many people.
You are classed as high risk being pregnant and he should not put you or the baby at risk. Also regarding the deleted messages just call the woman and ask what the sketch is.

All the best and stay safe x

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If he has an android phone, go to his maps app. Click on his letter icon (My name is Sherri so mine is “S”) in the upper right hand corner. Go to “your timeline” that should pull up where hes been with his phone. Lol this sounds crazy, but if you’re suspicious, take a peek. :woman_shrugging:

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He’s sus fuck him off. Ring the number or pretend to be him and ask her to meet him somewhere . Then go and be like wtf is up?

Are the deleted messages in his recycle bin? Could check for them there if he has a newer phone

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My x husband came home 1 night n I was on the couch he thought I was sleeping n he was washing his junk w just soap😂 no water then he attacked me when I asked him “wtf r u doin?” (He thought it was waterless soap or some shit cuz it was our baby’s soap n he saw me washing my son but didn’t see me rinse it off😅) Totally busted! We r now divorced lol just be careful cuz some men will hurt you if u call em out!

Please no more unprotected sex with him until he’s been tested. Your unborn baby and you are at high risk. Chlamydia causes blindness in fetus and is spread through saliva and sex. Please be safe🙏
I’m sorry for you and your children, the situation sounds toxic. I just had a baby and hell no your not hanging out with friends or strangers. I’m already scared of him bringing covid home from work everyone coming down with the sickness there.
All you haters can hate my opinion but until you’ve been sick or had an STD from your partner while pregnant than please don’t comment here thank you have a nice day.

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I would text her and ask her about it and ask him to

My therapist told me exactly this, “any text sent and deleted are text that should have NEVER have been sent in the first place. If it’s a conversation with someone they feel they need to hide the conversation, they shouldn’t be talking to that person. Period.”

I’m with honey, personally thats telling me something is up between them. And you may wants to make other arrangements for you and your baby, OR make clear big things needs to change(chick is gone forever and he needs to step up at home and no more going out without you).

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Deleting … red flag
3am messages from broads
Red flag
Why even question it tell him BUH BYE

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Ohhh lort… why have women become so dumb… girl he’s cheating. He’s gonna come home and give u herpes, chlamydia and covid while pregnant. :roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes::roll_eyes: don’t be a dum dum now. Use common sense and kick him out.

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He should NOT stay out that damn late. If you trust him he can definitely have guys night…but that is exactly what it says…Guys Night. No random girls…and he should be home at a decent hour.

Few things wrong here. We’re in lockdwon so he’s out at friends houses where there are lots of people, including girls you don’t know. You are pregnant. That puts you high risk for covid. He could be bringing it home to you! Half deleted texts and sleeping on the couch when he comes in at 3.30. I’d be having a harsh word with him for all of these accounts. And if your still worried about the girl. Phone her. She doesn’t know you so you may find she has nothing to loose by telling you the truth. Xx

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FIRST OF ALL…why is he out til 3:30 am without his s/o?? Why did he come in and sleep on the couch instead of in bed with u? Why would a woman that u don’t know have his number? Why are the text deleted? Why would she be asking HIM where her things are?? :thinking: I think u already know u ain’t over reacting. U just need validation for ur feelings

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If you look for bad stuff you will find it.
That said, dude is lying to you about something.
Being pregnant can bring out the worst in men.

He definitely cheated and after it was over she couldn’t find whatever item and point blank period you need to go to her or call her and see if it’s true. What was his body language, tone of voice, eye contact, annoyance level when you confronted him? Come on Lil mama yak what it is and you’ll either except it and move on or you’ll leave or throw him out. Time to co-parent I think though.

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This is actually pretty simple to fix… If you go into your settings. Like your going to do a phone reset, you can reset the phone back to a certian time and date and it will bring everything back up…:woman_shrugging: At least on my phone it does… Also, it could be that it was innocent, and that is why he deleted them because he didn’t want to stress you out, but then again why does this woman have his number if she was “just there”.

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