I found my husband flirting with women on snapchat: Advice?

He may be feeling unseen, unheard, men’s egos need boosting too and maybe he just wanted to see if he still “has it”. Does it make it ok? Absolutely not.

The after effect on you is a feeling of betrayal. That’s the issue you need to broach and communicate about. Men can be insecure too.

I don’t agree with e knee jerk reaction of “just leave” that some are saying. Deal with the issue, find the root cause. Go for counselling if you must, together where you can be open and honest with each other in a safe space. Good luck.

Nothing i have to say would … i can’t with these

Leave him and get yourself some counseling.

your a better person than me my ex hubby did same ! i kicked his arse out that very same day i found out ! didn’t matter too me that i loved him still ! i’m worth more than that ! and i would never trust him again :disappointed: and i didn’t want my young daughter thinking that behaviour is acceptable( not that she knows ) but i’m sure one day when she is older she may well find out ! and i don’t want her thinking that’s how a woman should be treated . i do hope you can get through this , but for me i value myself more and don’t want too be looking over my shoulder worrying for rest of my life :)it’s been three years now and i’m happier single he destroyed my trust so not ready too let a man in x

Maybe you are in love but I would seriously not believe him. Love is not breaking trust. This is the worst kind of disrespect. Putting up with stuff like this is extremely damaging for your self esteem.

Okay you caught him flirting with girls on Snapchat for one Snapchat is a cheating app for two what do you think you ain’t caught him doing you think because listen if they’re going to start flirting and texting other girls they’re already on their way to cheating after that there is no trust good luck with your marriage

I’m sorry but that’s not ok. He knew he would hurt you but he did it anyways. He knew you had trust issues but did it anyways. He knew it was wrong but he did it anyways. You are not over reacting. You are not in the wrong. You have to decide how much you are willing to take. That’s blatant disrespect to you and your relationship and unfortunately you will never be able to fully trust him again.

It definitely is serious… And it makes it so much worse when HE KNOWS how bad you’d feel if you’d found out and he STILL did it KNOWING!! I know you love your life with him and how far you’ve come, but any man that legitimately loves you, would NEVER EVEN THINK about even trying to contact another female. Hell, he shouldn’t even have those females on his snap in the first place and just having them on there in the first place is bad news. I’m sorry girl, I know you’re struggling with this but save yourself now.

I wouldn’t be so quick to defend his adoration when he is a cheater. Sounds like all that is love bombing bullshit.

I’m sorry for being so blunt but your husband does not love you, he does not worship thr ground you walk on, and he’s not crazy inlove with you. If any of that were true, not once would he have ever even thought of entertaining ANYONE else besides you. If it were true, then him knowing about your past and how bad your anxiety is regarding trust…he never would have crossed that line. I’m assuming you’ve told him everything you just told us and you mentioned he knows about your anxiety and yet he still betrayed you. He may not have been caught physically doing anything, but going behind your back(#1) and going on a specific app(an app that immediately deletes conversations)to talk to women(#2), claiming he tried to hide it bc he didn’t want to cause any issues(#3) then claimed he did it for “your best interest so your feelings don’t get hurt”(gaslighting and crappy excuse #4). I think you know what you’re going to do. You’re not going to leave him(you pretty much stated that) so how do you guys gain that trust back? That’s what you need to look at but I will say this probably isn’t the first time he’s done this and hopefully it hasn’t went further but there’s a chance. You made it clear you’re not leaving which means he also knows that and if he knows that, what is really stopping him from continuing to speak to other women? You need to speak up and stop it. Make it known you will leave or maybe leave for a few days for a break to gather both of your thoughts but you only go through certain things that you allow yourself to go through. He’s entertaining other women. You need to stop it or you’re going to write posts about marriage advice regarding cheating until your divorce or last breath. You only have 1 life, be happy in it.

If he was that great of a husband and worshipped the ground you walk on he wouldn’t have been flirting with other women.

He knew you had trust issues and hid things from you anyway…

I don’t think he would like it if it was the other way around.

Well what was his reason for doing it. Maybe he was just being stupid , he was bored, it could.be anything. I’d find out why. Seek transparency go forward and just hope for the best. If it’s the first hiccup in 10yrs I wouldn’t throw in the towel.

Words and actions are different. HE was showing you how he really feels. And imagine… he knew how that would break your heart and he still did it. Would he have kept going if you didn’t find out? Soumds like he worships himself. I wonder what he would do if it was you doing that?.. I bet he wouldn’t hesitate throwing in the towel…

See, this is just part of the reason my husband and I only have Facebook. We have so much trust built there, that’s never been broken. I don’t have to ever worry who he’s talking to or worry about him deleting anything. Get rid of all social media. It does wonders for your relationship. Snap turned into a dating app imo

Get your head out of the sand. He’s gonna keep doing it as long as you permit it. He obviously doesn’t “worship the ground you walk on” or any of that bullshit he keeps feeding you. Either leave or get used to it because it’s never gonna change. Sorry but someone has to be real with you. :woman_shrugging:

There is ways to get past cheating. But it will take time and effort from him to prove you it wouldn’t happen again. Nothing happens over night. My husband had a fling with someone and it’s taken years to get over and it was only over messages. We did counseling, started over from the beginning and “dated each other” 4 years now and I feel better but the thought of trust he broke will never go away. But we had learned a lot from our counseling and communication skills to help mend our marriage.

He clearly doesn’t “worship the ground you walk on” if he’s flirting with others. He’s gaslighting and manipulating you.

Go to counseling. Ask to be able to look thru his phone or share snapchat accounts. Be 100 percent open with one another. Are u OK with being in an open relationship. It this is not an option for you the no big deal flirting has to go. You have to put your foot down. This is not ok and I will leave you bc I’m damn good enough.

Worships the ground you walk on, but seeks attention from other females? Ummmm NO.

Talk, be honest, delete all social media, lay phones out. See if you both can work together though this before giving up.

Get help. Not to stay but to leave.

If he’s an amazing husband he wouldn’t have done that

A man in love doesn’t entertain other women.

If u not happy stop whining and just leave… I’m sure he doesn’t wanna listen to u cry all the time… WTF