I told a friend that I’ve known since high school that I was walking my kids to the park and to see if she wanted to meet us there. We’ve known each other for around 20 years. We’re not best friends but friends. She told me she’ll catch the bus and meet us there because she doesn’t drive. I said okay and we set a time. Well I was waiting on her to get there for about an hr so I text her to see where she was. She was at a different park with a friend who was able to pick her and her kids up. She had me waiting for nothing. She has kids my kids ages. I drive but my husband had our car. I don’t know how to handle this situation. She apologized but I’m really heartbroken. I didn’t respond to her I’m sorry text. I packed lunch for her and her kids because I know she’s struggling. I didn’t tell her I did this. There is an event coming up that I told her before this happened that I would pick her and her kids up for but now I’m not so sure I want to now. What would you do?
I can understand when there are money issues or what not BUT it cost nothing to respect other people’s time. I don’t think the problem is that she went to the park with someone else or didn’t come for that matter. The problem I see is thay she made a commitment and then made you chase her down so she could cancel after she made other plans. I’ve learned that my time is the most valuable asset I have and if you are going to waste it with zero regard for me then we have no more business together. All it would have taken was a text the moment she realized she wasn’t coming. Cancel the event with her and just move on.
I think everyone is forgetting that you were stood up and you had to reach out to her to find out where she was. That shows zero respect to you and your children and obviously didn’t value your time !!!
I wouldn’t make plans with her or do the event gig 
I completely understand being upset. She didn’t respect your time enough to let you know that she wasn’t coming. That was a shitty thing to do and the fact that you so kindly packed food for her and her kids makes it sting a little more. Not to mention that it seems like she ONLY told you because you asked after waiting for her.
That said, forgiveness is an important part of friendship. She apologized but only you know her so only you can know if it was sincere. You said she’s struggling. Sometimes when you’re struggling you make decisions based on the moment (taking the bus with kids to the park vs. going to a different park with someone who was able to bring them) and regret it when you realize how it has effected someone else. I don’t know if that’s the case here but if it is, your friend may need the grace you can give her.
Forgiveness is good for you too because anger takes much more negative energy. But forgiveness needs to come when you are ready. I would caution you to give it some thought because it’s way too easy to hold onto the hurt and anger. The fact that you are asking the question about whether or not to bring her to the event tells me that you don’t necessarily want to hold onto the anger and hurt. Maybe it’s time to let it go, forgive your friend and show her grace. You can kindly tell her that it hurt you but that you understand and accept her apology. We all make mistakes and we all deserve grace when we acknowledge them
How far in advanced was this planned? I’m the type who forgets if we speak a few days before. Thankfully everyone I know knows this so reminds me the day before 
but I never have left anyone hanging. I would’ve just invited you to come to the other park or explain why I couldn’t make it. That is rude imo.
So she’s struggling, you know she is, and you’re mad that she couldn’t catch the bus with her kids to meet you. She should have let you know she couldn’t come, I’ll give you that. As to the rest, give her some grace and move on. All you’re really doing is punishing her kids by excluding them from something you already invited them to.
Pft. I’ll b the petty one and say don’t pick her up for the future event and don’t tell her you aren’t coming to get her. It would have taken her 2 seconds to let you know plans changed instead of leaving you waiting.
Girl noooo. U set up a day together and she went with another friend clearly she is no friend
She should have called to cancel so you wouldn’t have been kept waiting. I would definitely ask her about that. If she thinks that is unimportant, then don’t ask her again. If she is truly apologetic and had a reason for not contacting you, then give her another chance.
Forget about it & pick her up for the event, not worth losing a 20 year friendship over.
Are you 15? I don’t know why this bothers you. Taking the bus is inconvenient. Especially with kids.
She should have communicated with you. Maybe she thought they were very casual plans and that you would be going to the park regardless of if she showed or not. Communicate with her about it calmly and cleary. I know it’s tough but I suggest not taking it so personal. We often make things about ourselves, when they’re not. Good luck Mama 
Wow! It’s not like y’all are dating and you got stood up. She doesn’t drive and has financial problems, maybe you should have went and picked her up.
Maybe she didn’t have enough for bus? She has kids too so it can be costly when you’re struggling.
I don’t know about being heartbroken. But she didn’t take any consideration into your time. It just shows zero respect. Everyone is glued to their cells. It takes legitimately 30 seconds to send a text message. People need to stop wasting other people’s time and energy. I understand being upset.
Don’t take it too personal if this is the first time she does this. Sometimes people make choices without knowing it affects others. I would encourage you to be honest and straightforward about your feelings --caused by her changing plans at the last minute. Give her another chance, but be cautious, and do not continue the friendship if she does it again.
Give your friend some grace. You don’t know what happened, you aren’t in high school and she probably didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I’ve had to cancel a lot of things lately and my mom friends are understanding and still invite me. I’m lucky.
She might have been upset because you didn’t offer to pick her up. Still pretty rude of her though. I wouldn’t make any more plans with her
I wouldn’t say you waited there for nothing. I’m sure enjoyed the quality time alone with your kids and got out of the house for awhile. Maybe next time, build the preparing lunch thing into the conversation when you’re first making plans, it may motivate her to follow through if she knows the effort you’ve put in already.
I would call her and tell her how you feel and that you packed lunch for them. I would tell her that sorry doesn’t cut it that was extremely rude and inconsiderate of her
your taking this WAY to personal. She should have called yes but she also doesn’t know what YOU did and endured and your faulting her for that without talking to her. The best thing you can do is express that you require notification because of x,y,z and ask it not happen again.
Give yourself some time to think before you decide then maybe called her explain that you had things organised and had been waiting and that she should have let you know that she was not going to be there . Let her take it from there and then decide about the other event .
As a parent with mom struggling brain, it could have slipped her mind to call you can up dated you especially if she has a lot going on.
And you know she’s struggling.
When she told u she had to take a bus, you should have offered to pick her up. Maybe that is hard for her to do with kids
I would explain to her the spot she put you in. Not in a condescending way. But explain that you had plans, your kids knew of the plans, you prepared lunch for everyone. So you were left with wasted time, upset kids and wasted food.
Explain that all she needed to do was notify you and it could have resolved a lot. Explain you understand her financial struggles however the disrespect is something that will not be forgiven a second time.
It’s okay to be hurt and accept an apology and move forward while also learning and stating your boundaries for yourself and your kids moving forward. And following through.
But communication is huge. Explain your disappointment. Explain you accept her apology. Explain your boundaries going forward. Confirm your next event. And just reiterate that if anything changes on her end to notify you asap.
People saying your childish is unnecessary. We can’t control the things that hurt us a lot of the time. How you respond to the hurt is what’s important. So take a breath and respond when you are in control of your emotions and not the other way around.
Should of called to cancel
Nah. You should be upset. A text or a call takes 2 seconds. Rude on her part. Next time bring nothing … don’t make this one sided . She has to meet half way
So what would be the harm in taking the high road?
Forget her she is no friend
Hard to know maybe money was tight and the bus fare was the problem.
Being heartbroken because someone did not showed up to a play date is childish and immature, you can be mad and disappointed but heartbroken 
stop being so dramatic , she chosen the most convenient option for her and her kids and in her situation you should be a little more understanding.
Maybe she was in a rush and forgot to text you .
Be a adult accept her apology and move on
Call it a day and don’t ask her again
She stood you up. That’s the issue.
she could have said something. it’s quite simple. she’s not a very nice friend.
You say you’ve known her 20 years. Is this repeat behavior? Or a 1 time thing
Maybe she realized after she agreed that she didn’t have the money for the bus. But either way she should have just let you know she wasn’t going to make it. Is she normally like this? From now on you could either not invite her or if you do invite her and she agrees just go expecting her not to come and if she does then she does but don’t plan things around it. As for the event either pick her up and go to it but don’t offer anymore or don’t bring it up and maybe she will forget.
It’s deff a disappointment and poor communication on her part. I would have responded with no problem things happen but next time please let me know if you have to cancel so I’m aware. Give her some grace this time. If it becomes frequent then I wouldn’t continue to waste your time.
While she showed no respect or consideration for you and your time, you did mention she was struggling perhaps she couldn’t afford bus fare