How to deal with toxic parents?

Doesn’t it suck to have a (I’m so sorry to say) toxic mother ? :sweat: mom lost her parents at a very young age so she lost some emotional support she needed. She grew up in a very toxic environment. Emotional and physical abuse. Anyways, me and my sister can see how toxic she is. She gets jealous of unnecessary stuff we do and makes us feel bad about it. It’s like we have to revolve our world around her and put her first every single time. She’s very manipulative and always finds ways to turn things around when she gets confronted. She never apologizes for making others feel bad and makes it their fault :slightly_frowning_face: I wanna cut her out of my life, but she’s my mother and I still love her. Not looking for any sympathy just wondering if anyone here goes through the same with their mom.


My mother was the exact same way…we couldn’t be around each other without a fight…she’d never admit her wrongs…sadly I wish I could have just shook my head and went on …my mother is no longer here

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Going threw the same thing !

Same here and still going through it! It sucks!

Yes! My mother was physically and mentally cruel my entire life, even into adulthood. I cut ties with her ten years ago and have lived a happy life since. Just because they’re your blood doesn’t mean squat. To this day, my only regret is not cutting her out of my life earlier in my life!


Same life here. I tell her what she needs to know, and I only do that because of my grandma. My grandma should of have gained cuscustody of us honestly.

My mom is awful. I rarely talk to her now and she knows how I feel. She drove my sister and I apart and we just reconnected. We’ve both decided to just be civil with her for now but we have drawn very strict boundaries on what she can be involved in for our lives.

You are allowed to cut out toxic people. Read that again.


Yes, you are not alone. Just remember when she is acting in a less than perfect way, she is doing the best she can given her background. Know that the one perfect thing she did was give life to you. Cut her some slack and learn from her how not to act with your children.

My Mother is the same way! She has always been so jealous!!! Not having her in my is one of the best decisions I have ever made!!!

Yup! Cut her out, blood or not, toxic is toxic. Don’t drive yourself insane over anybody. If shes doing you more harm than good cut her out.

My dad used to be mean to me and belittle me. Send me rude texts etc. I cut him out of my life for over a year. Then finally he changed after he realized what he did to me. We’ve been talking again for 2 years. Dont be afraid to cut someone out of your life if their treating you like crap. Stand your ground and cut them off. I know I felt much better when I did it.

Sadly we don’t choose who births us…you already know her traits and take caution around her but the fact still remains she is your blood mother raised and loved by her… Sara spears your right you should sets boundaries too…

Toxic is toxic… I don’t talk to my mother…

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Yes;!!! I pray for my mother daily. Its all i can do.

I have one of those as well it’s very sad but it is what it is :sob: my mother let me know my entire life she never wanted me. I have not spoken to her in 9 years now. It’s better for me.

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I’ve been kicked out by my mother’s life multiple times. I’ve gone through her being jealous of any relationship (friendship, mentorship, romantic) and her sabotaging every single one. I’ve dealt with being called Satan, and removed from my siblings life to have the tables turned and the sibling told I abandoned them. So much I could post, but these are enough to show, she was toxic. I’ve been estranged from her multiple times, and every time I try to fix things, it’s less than a month she’s back at her toxic ways. I’ll be waiting for an apology probably until a death bed.
Now that I have my own family, I have set my foot down. She must get professional help before being allowed in our lives.
It is hard. It is an emotional turmoil for me most of the time. And most people will never even attempt to understand, but will try to make you feel guilty…“but she’s your mom.”
But, you are not alone. You can leave. Life will go on with out her, and you can make it an amazing life.


I’m lucky enough to not have a toxic mother, and I’m sorry you’re dealing with it, but I did want to say you’re allowed to be an adult. You’re allowed to cut toxicity out of your life without feeling guilty.


I wouldn’t know because my mother died when I was 11 years old. But my guess is I would have experienced much of the same. Most of what I remember of her was her being drunk all the time and me having a new daddy every other month

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I’ve cut my mum off. I’ve never been so happy. My anxiety has calmed massively. You have every right to cut her off. You have only one life, do not spend it walking on eggshells just because it’s your mother. You deserve to be happy.


I cut my abusive mother out of my life and i dont regret it at all. She is the reason im as messed up as i am. Anx im slowly healing now that shes out of the picture.


It’s like you read a page out of the book of my life :cry:


I never had that with my mom but i had it with my father

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My dad is very toxic, i cut him out long ago. Toxic is toxic regardless of who they are. Family can be just as toxic!


Sounds like my mom…made our child hood a living hell…very passive aggressive…she used to hide her meds and wake us up and make us help her find them…then accuse us of taking the.m…she said she’s ask God for forgiveness so she owes nobody on this earth an apology…if my dad passes before her she is headed straight to nursing home…karma. Coming back around…

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I cut off my entire family for these reasons… The toxic cycle ends with me and I don’t want my kids on the recieving end of it either. If you decide to, it may hurt for a little while. But the positivity that comes with not having that negative energy around you is an amazing reward. Good luck.


My mom was like this I cut her out of my life. She was so abusive and really bad.
I still have nightmares but living is better for me. I am so sorry hugs

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I went thru the same thing, I would cut her out and then let her back in, and I’m glad I never co.pletely cut her out. Shes gone now and I’m glad for the good times we had, and try not to think about the harm she done… do what feels right to you, you will have to live with it either way, dont let her control that, prayers for you

I was the adult at a young age never really had a childhood. I am messed up but I have to say it’s better now.

Yup, it’s been 12 years since I cut all contact. It’s been the most peaceful 12 years. Just because she is your mother doesn’t mean you have to put up with it. Life is too short to deal with that kinda of bs.

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Not my mom but my father. It got to the point that I will no longer speak to him on the phone, I will text him only. I have him blocked on Facebook because he would start shit on multiple posts of mine if he gets pissed off at me.

That’s my mom To a T. she would also set me up to throw me under the bus as well. I did cut her out of my life and it was the most stress free almost three years of my life. She’s gone now and I didn’t even want to go to her funeral, but I did.

If you do want to see your mom, do it only in public places with other people around, preferably where you can keep talking to a minimum. If she starts being nasty, leave right then. My girlfriends and I would invite our moms for tea & each of us would chat with someone else’s mom. They have fun, feel like they’ve spent time with you, but you don’t really have to deal with them. Set a manageable end time to limit the possibility of them being a jerk.

She made my life hell physically/mentally everyday as a child. She’s still toxic & we don’t have a close relationship, but I’m not a kid under her control anymore and I’ve made that very clear. She still tries to make herself the victim in every situation even if she is the one who started the problem. She didn’t have a father figure or a close relationship with her mom but that was never my fault or an excuse for her to act the way she did towards me or my siblings. I love my mom too but we will never be close, I will tolerate her as long as she’s not draining me of my happiness like she once did.

If you can afford a place get out she wont change. She needs to get a life of her own

Love her from a distance your sanity means more to you than anything

Yea that’s me also. And I feel guilty that I can only stomach like 1 visit a year

Toxic is toxic. You need to cut her out. For your own mental and emotional health