Does anyone else’s husband wait til you’re “in bed” or “sleeping” or in the shower to take off, yes leave the house and you have no idea where they went?! And 99.9% they’re leaving to go drink or they come home drunk. “You’re sleeping what does it matter where I go?” Apparently I’m crazy cuz I have an issue with this.
It’s just basic manners & respect.
He’s an addict get outtttt!!!
The biggest issue I see here is that you’re still with him
That’s ficled up and I’m a guy. I’d be divorced after the second time
He is 1000% wrong. Trust your intuition!
If you don’t have kids run run fast
I wouldn’t even tell you to stoop to his level and leave when he sleeps. That’s unnecessary tbh. Idc what anyone says. That behavior is unacceptable. You need to see yourself out of that relationship asap
No. That’s sketchy and you aren’t crazy. It’s also dangerous bc anything could happen and you might not know where he is.
No way… locks would be changed before he go home
Why does he feel the need to be sneaky about it? The way he’s acting makes me think even he thinks what he’s doing is wrong.
I have to know where my husband is at all times and informed of such an outing. It’s common courtesy.
That’s not okay. He should respect you enough to at least let you know where he’s going and what he’s doing. Yes he’s grown, but in marriage you have to have respect for your spouse.
The detective in me would be on the case !
Nope, only to go to work at 4 am, I’m very blessed
I think you two need to have a conversation. If he wants to hang with friends have an open discussion about that. If he wants Mr time tell him that he don’t have to wait to do that. Unless he is hiding something. But definitely need to talk about it and tell him that you know. And ask him why
Sounds like an addict with narcissistic tendencies gaslighting you when you confront him by saying your crazy it is not ok if he will sneek out to drink what is stopping him from sneaking off with someone his behavior is unacceptable he would be locked out the next time if it was me I say run as fast as you can he’s is showing he doesn’t respect you at all and the more you allow the more he will do it cuz he’s probably thinking I can do whatever I want she won’t leave me
My EX husband used to do it all of the time
That’s disrespectful to your relationship to be honest. Unless he says he’s going out with friends, just taking off & not telling anyone where he went is disrespectful.
He sounds like he’s struggling with alcoholism. I’d get him and yourself into therapy
No it’s def wrong. Do you know for a fact he’s going out drinking? ￼It’s definitely not OK! ￼ I would investigate, make off your sleeping and take off to find out where he’s going. ￼
That won’t happen in my house. He’s gonna continue what you allow. Put your foot down immediately and make it known your not going to be manipulated!
He may leave but he wouldn’t get back in.
He knows its wrong or he wouldn’t wait till you sleep.
Yep he would come home then be gone when i woke up…he wasn’t my husband but we were engaged and he disappeared for 14 days…turns out I was one of 7 girls he was seeing …one for each day of the week so I suggest you get out of there asap…and yes it does matter where he goes because yall are married. Honey you deserve better
no never if he goes some were he would wake me but most times like 99.9 he stays home he works we got kids
I imagine most people would have an issue being married to an alcoholic. Him calling you crazy is gaslighting. Time to bounce.
He is trying to put you on a guilt trip for the bad he does. Start being all cleaned up when he leaves,. When he comes home be asleep like you could care less. After a few times he will start worrying about what you are doing while he is gone, even though you aren’t doing anything it will make him worry if he cares anything about you
The locks would be changed by the time he got back.
Absolutely not and if mine did an airtag would be going in the car with them. I would be collecting my info and deciding whether to show up exactly where they are or leaving. I honestly wouldn’t stay.
You already know the answer to your question.
Private investigator then divorce
Next time he leaves the house put the chain on ! Keep him out! What a horrible man ! Mine done the same, he was going for diesel or he couldn’t sleep so went for a drive… later found out he was visiting a coke dealer… run don’t walk, this is not normal!
You are Not crazy. And you put up with it all you want, but it isn’t right.
I would wait until he is sleeping and u go out with your girl friends! I guarantee he would not like that, and u would say “what does it matter you were sleeping” …
That’s not okay hun.
Private detective - divorce.
Honestly this is weird AF. Why wait until I go to sleep like you’re sneaking? That’s sus and I would lose all trust after the second time.
What if he’s bringing you home an std.
Nah I wouldn’t be married anymore, do yourself a favor take a long look in the mirror and figure out that you’re worth more than that, and that someone else will treat you better, stop wasting your life and time and move on… He’s better off single with that sorta mindset and you can do better
I’d take his house keys off his key ring . And lock the doors !
Also when I was married to my ex husband - we both had Iphones and I turned on his sharing location . He had no idea I could see where he was. I busted up on the scene at his drug dealers house and caught him!
You’re completely valid in your feelings. What he’s doing is not okay! Very suspicious! His behavior is that of an addict! And it could also be very possible that he’s sneaking out to see someone else! All very fishy! I say do yourself a favor and break up with him. He obviously doesn’t respect you and has something he is hiding!
No that’s a huge red flag that behavior is not ok
No way this isn’t acceptable in my books
Why does he have to wait? Why can’t he be honest? This screams addiction. Your husband’s an alcoholic and he needs help
Wait till his azz falls asleep and leave even if it’s to go have a cup of coffee at Waffle House and see how he likes it. Ridiculous that anyone would put up with this crap.
I would change the locks while he was away. And then not answer the door.!!!
Dodgy and unacceptable!!! Lock him out, your are his partner not his mum
He’s seeing some one that’s why he waits so u can’t follow him girl kick his ass out
Let him go to the bar, pack his shit and sit his belongings around his car. Ain’t a single reason for a married man to behave that way. You deserve better, be with someone who wants to sleep beside you.
That would tell me, he’s hiding something, like cheating! Time for a divorce…but that’s just me!
Umm that seems sketchy AF. Especially if he is saying things like you’re crazy and acting like this is ok. Run
He knows you don’t want him to go out drinking. It saves the drama until he’s already done what he wants. I bet if you left while he was asleep or wasn’t home when he decided to come home he’d have an issue with it.
I can think of no good reasons why he would do that and it raises a lot of Red Flags that he is calling you crazy for having valid feelings.
I would change the locks while he is away.
Your married so yea it matters where he is “sneaking off 2 “ and if it’s not sneaking then why can’t he tell u when he’s leaving or where he is going? Is it just him leaving without telling u that is a problem ? Or the drinking? If it’s both then maybe it’s time for a intervention
tell him it’s extremely inconsiderate of you and your family! he sound like a man child. send him back to mommy
Girl change the locks and make him sleep out side
My boyfriend did this once to me in the 6 years we’ve been together, I lost my mind, found out where he was, and drug him home. He’s never done it since
Check the google timeliness babe u will find it.
Your partner should want to be in bed asleep with you. My partner would never go out drinking with anyone else unless it was planned in advance, I knew who was going and it’s typically some sort of holiday or event. The issue you’re having with your partner is unhealthy and he needs a come to Jesus moment.
Leave while he’s sleeping since it’s normal to him
Hahaa wtf ! As if you’d ask this instead of realise and leave. I’m sorry to be harsh, but honey open ya eyes! Literally! He’s either unhappy with something he’s done or you & going out on the piss to get smashed, or he’s cheating. I’d go with cheating though.
He also sounds like a narcissist. LEAVE HIM & do not look back! You deserve better!
Please do not let him gaslight you!! There is a reason your gut is screaming!! With that being said… I would be tracking his phone gathering and info. Then the next time he leaves changing the locks. If he refuses help then he gets served papers.
I know at all times where mine is and it’s at his own insistence (iPhone). He chooses for me to know. We also have an app for the whole fam since we have a 16 y/o. Our kid tracks us more then we do each other lol
Yep, mine got another woman. I got a private investigator AND our son.
Yes he would my hubby do that
But never to drink
Do I think there’s been other woman yes
Do I have the proof no
Cause I tolerate a lot of stuff
But I will not tolerate that
I love myself and kids and grandkids more then that
Too dangerous same with drugs if you do anything hard then weed nope I will be gone
There will be no yelling fighting of any sort
He will come home to note on the table
You was warned
I will never divorce him for me he’s it
I don’t have in me or they what to start all over again with new man
It’s too much
I’ll be on my own by myself
Like I said I will tolerate a lot of stuff cause I’m not perfect or peach to deal with sometimes
But hard drugs heavily drinking and cheating I won’t do
I never cheat and never will
But girl good luck
In the end how much is enough and what is the hardline for you
Oh HELL NO. Unacceptable and making you out to be the problem is narcissistic. Get out of the relationship now. He doesn’t care about you.
Turn his location on, and share it with your self while he is asleep, Or just put a air tag in his car, But honestly u shouldn’t have to do any of that! You deserve respect and honesty and yes he deserves privacy but to a certain extent when u are in a marriage, There’s absolutely no reason to hide where u are going all the time from your wife unless u are cheating or just up to no good.
Leave, that’s it, that’s all.
Yeah. Mine would be late getting home. I’d call and he’d be playing pool with some strange woman. I’m now single. He did all sorts of horrible things. When they stop caring or respecting your feelings then it’s time to go. I did. I feel so much better.
That would be a big NO girl you’re in for it if you stay
Hell no. That’s not okay at all. Why does he feel the need to be sneaky? Are you sure that’s even where he’s going? Just because he comes home drunk doesn’t mean he was drinking at a bar
Bruh… I’d be bleaching all his shit
No you’re not crazy. What he’s doing is not ok. I had a husband that did that and he was cheating. I finally divorced him it was the best thing I ever did I am now happily married to someone that likes to b a home with me
Whaaaa? No way. That’s crazy
Nah. That’s so childish of him. Why is a grown man sneaking out??? Why can’t you go out together? Why does he hide what he does??? Not at all normal… it definitely happens, just not to me. I’d be single in the same second he locks the door behind him.
Dealt with this shit for years.
Putrid, gives me the ick like nothing else
Yes mine does. I used to be so hurt and cry. It’s just not worth it. He’s going to do what he does. I know there are women and drugs involved. I’ve just got to the point I’m happy at home, go where I want and do what I want. But we have been married 21 years
Omg my friend husband use to do that they are now divorced! Lol
I would put his sh&t out And change the locks
He’s out drinking and cheating. Guarantee it
No my husband never does that I always know where he is. I don’t understand why yours waits until you’re asleep or taking a shower he should tell you where he’s going so you don’t worry.
Sound like he’s cheating to me
well I would say, if you ask him about this & he is evasive about it, maybe leave him, Just a thought
Umm I’d be gone after the 2 or 3rd time this would happen. Yes I would have a major problem. If he waits until you are sleeping and doesn’t tell you he is hiding it from you and yeah that’s definitely so wrong
Jesus is this high school? A grown man sneaking out like he don’t want his mama to know. If I’m married I’d want it to be to an adult. Not whatever this is. If he makes you feel less for having these feelings then it’s probably time to skedaddle
Pretend to be asleep and follow him when he leaves
Put an apple tag in his car
Divorce. Yesterday. Absolutely not! And he’s gaslighting you to boot. Do that to him and see how he likes it. I bet he doesn’t! He’s being sneaky AF. It’s drugs or cheating 100%
Ooof I could not deal with this that’s for sure!!
Boy bye pop his tires take your keys back and let someone else have him
He sounds like a deadbeat tbh
If he’s leaving to drink, he has a drinking problem and doesn’t want you hounding him about it. But I’d tell him you’re leaving him if he continues
Play him at his own game & see how he likes it.
My x use to do this… We had 2 children and were together 11 years too long… He’d take off for days…even a week here and there to go hang with buddies… Go on benders… I couldn’t fix him… I left him… Met an amazing MAN who chooses me. My kids and our Child together… 7 years in and the x has gone down hill… Sad but best choice I ever made! Trust your heart…
My ex did that all the time he was a drug addict . I know he was going to go out and do something stupid that he wasn’t supposed to so he would wait till I was in the shower or sleep and he would take off. He refused to get help or even see that it was an issue and he tried to blame me. He never took responsibility or accountability for anything that he did he would always turn it around to somehow be my fault. I’m so glad I left that relationship all these years later he is still the same! I suggest you just leave because he won’t change
This is what your best girlfriend or sister is for lol if it’s regular and you know he will be doing it, have them wait up the street then follow him and see where he goes. Have them take videos if there’s something fishy going on. Also, if he’s drinking and driving… that’s an issue all in itself! You could also do the same to him! See how he feels about it! Wait til he leaves then go stay at someone else’s house and find out how he feels when he gets home and you’re not there. Make sure not to answer his calls either!
Seriously though, I’d be giving him an ultimatum. Stop it, or leave. If he wants some time to himself or with his buddies, fine. But tell you in advance and where he will be and who with. And no drinking and driving! Offer to drop him off and pick him up. Good luck!
Don’t say anything just plan a night out and watch how fast he gets mad!
Honestly I would be knocked TF out and wouldn’t always notice my ex was doing this. He would sometimes use my car which I would then notice cause my car was like be in a different parking spot or the seat would be different. He was leaving to cheat. It’s a extremely sneaky and deceptive.
Sketchy af he’s either seeing someone else or on drugs
I’d lock him out and make sure all windows are locked lol if he has a key I’d put something behind the door…
he’s not leaving me alone at night when I sleep hekkkknoooo lmao esp if I dunno where he’s going…
but then again my man wakes me even if he sleeps in the living room if our baby has a hard night…
Not crazy at all hun I would be livid ! And he would be signing divorce papers ASAP period! 1st time shame on you(him) 2nd time shame on me….
The sneaky way he IA doing this has most of our intuitions on high alert. Does he do this often? Do you believe he’s an alcoholic? The only “out” o see us owrhaps thus us all he knew growing up? That the husband can go do stuff while the wife’s asleep? Even that is a MEGA stretch