My husband works during the week with his brother, uncle and mom. He sees them sometimes all day, five days a week. Other days it’s just off an on. He comes home and plays games, looks at adult Material while pretending he’s not, and watches shows on tv, usually by himself. He refuses to spend any quality time with me or his baby or step kids in the evenings. He seems to shut us out and become frustrated if we bother him. On weekends he has started going out at least one day, if not both days or evenings, he’s supposedly going to his brother’s house or to meet his brother at a restaurant to watch a game, sometimes it’s his uncle or mom as the excuse, or golfing with his brother. The same people he sees all week long. I get no one on one time, no real help with the kids, no nice adult conversation, he doesn’t have sex with me except maybe five times broken up thru each year. I’ve tried to point out that he should be saving weekends for the family he has made as an adult, not leaving us for his other family any and every chance he gets. We aren’t invited to these get-togethers. I’ve fought with him about that aspect over and over. I think it’s incredibly rude for his family and him to exclude me. I think he should either take us or mostly just not go. It’s not fair to me, his year old or his step kids. Am I crazy for thinking he should be watching these games at home with his kids and wife, except maybe on occasion? His brother always has his partner with him and usually his kids, so it’s crazy for my husband, to leave all three of his kids and his pregnant wife to go be with them every weekend. Am I wrong here? Or is he disrespectful and his brother for always doing things to take him away from his family and purposefully not invite us?
Throw the whole husband away
He’s probably cheating
Yeahhhh he needs to go ! He obviously has no interest in being a family man !!!
Your husband is a piece of crap and probably cheating.
Throw out the entire man
& it sounds like he’s cheating !!!
He has a choice I wouldnt blame the family sounds like he isnt to invested to be like that he really dosent seem to give a fuck dosent sound like a good relationship at all and you dont sound happy,it sounds like something is going on probs using family as an excuse get your ducks in a row save as much as you can and get rid of that piece of shit really sounds like a heartless prick
Yea time to leave already doing it yourself
Cheating or gay with his brother
Leave. If you mattered to him, this wouldn’t be an issue. It isn’t fair to you or the kids.
You deserve a partner and parent who is involved. Period.
What a hard choice you are going to make, stay with him and put up with his rude family that doesn’t have any respect for you and live a lonely life or leave him and find someone that enjoys your company and your kids and be a real family
It sounds like he’s cheating in my opinion
You already know that you should just tell him to move out. He should just stay at his mamas house
He is cheating and his family knows it and is covering for it . Been there get away as fast as you can before they make you think you’re crazy
How could you let yourself get pregnant again? Seems like you already knew he was a lousy father. I hope you have a job. Get your ducks in a row.
He would be living with them not me and if hes got kids he would take care of them the one yall have together he would get visiting rights and nomore than that
He sounds like a piece of shit , I hope things get better or you find someone who treats you like a queen because damn girl you deserve it!
Id put my foot down tell him starting right now you are going to spend some time with me and the kids or you gotta go.
There is a ton of red flags here. I say leave.
His brother isn’t taking him away, he’s a grown man, he is not with his brother, ask his brother
Honey he is cheating take the kids and run sounds like he won’t fight for them anyways
Nah leave his ass period. He obviously doesn’t care about you or the kids.
Girl he’s cheating. And everything else everyone said- and you should get tested for stds. Consult a lawyer, get a plan please. You deserve so much better.
Unfortunately it’s not going to get better and he’s not going to change.
You will leave him when you realize this and when you are ready to leave-not a second sooner
I hope everything works out for the best for you and you don’t wait on him to change for 17 years like I did
He ain’t with his family.
I feel like this is a classic case of an affair.
Definitely sounds like cheating…
Well do you know it’s his brother not inviting you or your husband excluding you and the kids?? I would be on my own if I was doing it all on my own. Then maybe his children will get time with him. Then maybe you can find someone who wants to spend time with you and your children. Good luck and God bless.
Girlfriend. He’s not even in that marriage anymore mentally. Counseling.
he ain’t into you, or the fam. He stopped caring, and can’t step up like a man. He’s left emotionally before he leaves physically. End of story. Stop beating a dead horse, he’s done, and you should be done as well. Contact a lawyer, and file—and get your child support
Girl, leave. He may not be cheating, but he damn sure isnt interested in being with you.
If he wanted to spend time with you he would he is definitely 100 percent cheating!!!
Yep get him out! Sounds like another Jason collier guy
I dont know why people are laughing at this and I hope your okay
These comments must be pretty hard to read xx
Your not disrespectful for feeling that way . Sounds like there is something more then just wanting to be around his family going on . HT sounds like he has someone on the side and his family knows about it and are covering up for him . My question is , why are u putting yourself and your kids thru this hurt
sounds like my ex he was cheating with every easy chick in town hes still a crap did after we seperated he clearly doesnt care about his child let alone you or your kids if he never wants to be around get out hes cheating
Take the kids to a friend to sit for a bit and when he leaves, follow him and you will have the answers you need
Sadly this has cheating written all over it. But it won’t do any good to tell you to leave because you’re already being treated like you’re not worth the dirt on his shoes and you’re still there. I hate to say it, but somebody has to. You can either deal with or you can leave. Those are the only choices you have because you’ve already shown him that you’re not worth respecting and it’s never going to stop.
You need to play detective one night and follow him see where he’s actually going. But that’s just me. This is fishy.
Sorry babe need to take the hint and move forward
Sounds like he’s cheating.
If jes not even having sex with you hes not in your marriage anymore…I’d file for divorce and start living the life you deserve instead of sitting there thinking hes rude wondering what’s wrong with you
Throw the whole man away. You deserve so much more.
I haven’t even read any of the comments before add what I had to say. So here it goes. He’s bored with you he’s not ready to be a husband/ father and chances are he’s not hanging with family on the weekends. Move on!!!
I’m so suss of all the ‘family’ time that I’d go for a drive one night to check his whereabouts. Or if he’s watching a game, be like, hey send me a pic of the scores or something.
Im not convinced he’s cheating but he’s not happy. A husband and wife should be bestfriends. It doesn’t even sound like your friends and he’s not interested in even trying. Throw him out, honestly.
Life is short. Get out as fast as you can and find a man that will cherish his time with you. You deserve so much better!
First, I’m sorry you are so lonely. I would talk to him and tell him his priorities need to change or you have to leave. Only make this an option if you’ll follow through because if you don’t he won’t take you serious. If you don’t want to leave tell him you don’t want to have the relationship you do and you suggest marriage counseling. This isn’t fair to you or your children. You don’t want him to be the example they think a family man/father should be. It does look like something is fishy on his side since you’re never invited. I would compromise and say you can have this many days a month to do relaxing but the rest of family time.
You can’t make someone want to spend time with you. Leave him!
You’re not wrong and you’re basically a single parent aren’t you? You’re doing everything. What’s the point of this relationship?
Why would you even be with someone like this? He sounds like a real loser. Ditch him
Its him not his brother I’m sure they probably in invited you and kids to start with but he told them you didn’t want to come I would ask the wife of the brother what is up and get the truth it seems like you do it all but work so get you a job and start taken care of you and them babies and make them babies daddy’s pay child support and alimony and live for you and them babies don’t beg know man to have anything to do with you or your babies
How are bills? And other aspects other then your relatuon ship? Is he stressed depressed? He could be stressed and blocking everything out
I am not convinced he is cheating, always a possibility, but my first thought when I read your post is NEITHER of you are happy! I mean have a conversation, ask the hard questions get the hard to hear answers and go from there! ANY relationship will not survive without clear communication, trust, and boundaries! Good Luck I pray you are able to do what you feel is best for your family but mainly for yourself!
Mmmm I don’t like the sound of this. I can’t give advice cause I don’t know the whole story but It doesn’t sound like he’s being fair to you and doesn’t seem interested in anything to do with you and the kids. Maybe try to figure out what his problem is. Give him a chance to explain and talk… on another note Me and my boyfriend are having sex at least 1,2,3 times a week. We have two kids and he sees us as equals in the relationship. He always knows when he makes a mistake and tried to make up for it , like if he slacks on soemthing. He always makes me feel like he’s trying to be fair. Even tho the kids depend on me most of the time because I’m mom and I was breastfeeding. Having sex 5 times a year sounds horrible! I’m sorry he’s not appreciating you. It doesn’t sound like this is a relationship though. I’m sorry. I hope you find peace. Try not to stress too much. You will be ok either way
Walk AWAY!! Any “guy” who doesn’t want to do family things or involve you or the step kids is not the one!
He is being selfish and doing things only for himself! Especially if there is no sex! A REAL MAN will not make you feel like this period’
Leave and allow someone to show you what a family really is, not good for the kids to grow up thinking that’s okay.
2 words… super selfish
He’s definitely showing how much you don’t matter to him.
Now strap your boots up, and handle your business!! File for custody/support! #HeIsABiotch
Why are you two together? I don’t want to sound rude, but you need to think about that.
Before you take advice from any of these people saying he’s cheating. Do some dirt digging and track his phone or fallow him. Sit down and talk to him and express how you feel. Ask of him if he ain’t happy. What needs to change to make him happy. If he’s just not happy with the relationship than tell him to hit the door bc you can find better. Everyone always just assumes the guy is cheating. Probably bc they been in the same shoes and their man did cheat but that don’t mean your man is a cheater to. But definitely sit down with and have a conversation and if that don’t work track his phone fallow him or something
He’s not invested in you or your family for whatever reason wether it’s cheating or he is with his family he doesn’t care
People will treat you how you let them… Leave
I dont know if he’s cheating I would definitely try to find out not by asking his family because they’re not going to tell you, check his phone, follow him. Also you should do things with the kids dont rely on him, you make memories with them, not everything costs money, go to a park, go on a nature trail, have a picnic, have a film day, visit friends or family, join a mother and child group etc… it will get you out and meeting new people, dont include him dont even ask him to join in. Id throw him out rather than you leave with the children also see a lawyer before you do.
He must have super sperm if you only have sex every few months and are pregnant in all honesty he sounds like a douche who isn’t gonna change, you’re bringing these kids up like a single mum so you might as well be one and let him realise what he’s lost
Gosh what a dick, hunni you deserve so much more and the kids do too! You need to leave him you all worth so much more and you practically a single parent now and practically single anyway! Get rid and move on I wish you all the best
He’s having an affair you deserve someone who wants and appreciates a family. Dump him. There are plenty of other fish in the sea.
I hate to be this guy, but he’s emotionally checked out of your relationship. My ex husband acted like this the moment I had our son. I’m not the type to get to insecure about myself, however when your partner is being weird all the time and stuff you start to see the red flags. Anyway one day I caught him off guard, never gone through his phone before. So I went through it and found my answer, followed him to even see if he went. Turns out he was having an affair the entire relationship. Even had gotten another woman pregnant at the same time as me. Sadly she lost her baby and I gave birth to my son. In the end I gave him a choice and he chose a piece of ass over his family. I’m glad he did though, best thing he could have ever done for me. That divorce was a blessing girl. Hit him with a divorce and hit him for child support. Xoxo
Sounds more like he wants to be living the single life, but pick and choose when he wants to be a family. U need to have a serious talk with him. Ask him what he really wants in his life with you and the kids? Or does he want to be his own person . He sounds withdrawn.
Sounds like you need to hear a word. That word is “Attorney”. He’s not into being an adult, parent, spouse and he’s not into you. Time for you to take care of yourself your children and handle what you already know needs to be done.
I wouldn’t blame his family at all. This is all on him. Who knows, they could be inviting y’all and he just doesn’t say anything. I would honestly have a sit down conversation with him, or counseling. Give that a chance to work. If he still refuses to grow up and be an adult/husband/father, I would probably talk to an attorney to see what your options are and maybe stay with someone in your family, or a friends place for a little
Never beg for attention or love from any man. Apparently you are strong enough to take care yourself, your children and your home without anyone else"s help. Be proud of that. Respect yourself and really think about things. A woman deserves better than what you are being given. Love yourself enough to do whatever you feel is necessary or right. I will keep you in my prayers. God bless.
Have you talked with the in laws about your frustrations? I’m sure his mommy would like to know what kind of pos she raised
When he goes out tell him to take his kid with him to see the family. And get up earlier than him on the weekend take your kids out for the day and tell him that it’s Daddy’s time with the baby. If he can’t take you out to family gatherings he’s got something going on but make him take some responsibility. Send his kid to grandma’s with him.
I’m just making a guess here, but it sounds like he may have a side chick. My dad used to cheat on my my Mom. His excuse for going out was work. He worked at IBM, so that should have been a red flag there.
Tell him to leave. You are wasting your time with him. Make sure you get a good lawyer and make him pay for it. Then let him pay for the house for you and the kids to live in and child support for his baby. It will take a little time but you will be much happier. That is not how you or your kids deserve to be treated. And kids know a lot more than we sometimes think. They are gonna feel like they aren’t good enough for him to want to spend time with them. Get him out. Name one reason to keep him there.
Pretty much he’s cheating, probably not even with his brother or family on the weekends. I would be creeping on him, then again don’t waste your time , get u a babysitter and start having your self fun
Time to get out! You csnt make him want to be what he doesnt want to be. You can only control what you do. Good luck to you, there has to be something better.
If he wanted to spend time with you… he would simple as that. His family is not to blame… it’s him alone… I’d try talking to him again and if he doesn’t respond accordingly… peace out life is too short to be miserable. You shouldn’t be with someone who doesn’t respect your feelings…
He’s telling you by his actions that he does not love you anymore. When you love someone you want to spend time with them. Instead of facing the problem he is choosing to ignore it. You deserve better!
I would say he’s selfish and inconsiderate and possibly cheating on you and his family knows about it. Time to think about leaving. I’m usually for working it out but I don’t see that happening.
By the time I wrote all this I would have already packed his things and send them to his family. Get up, stand up, open your eyes and mind. Start fresh all over again, by getting help from your family, get a job and lead a normal life without any men in your life, you can do it, we can live without men.
Pack the car ready for next weekends event to the parents or brothers. Just get everyone ready to go and dont mention. it to him, just get in the car and go; if he says anything just tell him you want to visit family too. If he disputes you going then go consult with an attorney and plan your exit very carefully and be prepared.
How can you even questione if your wrong here?! You need to hire a private detective. Or just get things ready then. File for divorce.
Hes been down right disrespectful i my self would not put up with this it is no fair on you and your kids
Get him out your house or you take the kids and leave I wouldn’t say a word to him about it. He obviously doesn’t want you anymore
I would keep telling him how I feel, and if he keeps ignoring me I would show up wherever he says he’s going with the kids in tow and I would leave the kids with him and immediately go have some “me” time! It will give him a taste of his own medicine! Every time he leaves without you follow and then leave the kids with him seriously, either he will get the point or you will have some very important decisions to make!
Follow your gut, if it’s telling you that something just ain’t right, then it’s not. Play private eye, that’s what l did and sure enough it wasn’t just me. When he finally got home, l told him to get h his things and get out (l already had them packed), I will not be the other woman when I’m suppose to be your wife.
Have you talked to these family members and made sure he is with them, cuz honestly sounds like he has a gf on the side
I think there is more behind the story. That doesnt sound like a man who loves you…
I might sound crazy. But maybe next time hes "going to a restaurant " follow him.
Just sounds like hes lying hun.
Follow your woman intuition. It doesn’t feel right then it’s not right.
Sounds like a selfish inconsiderate asshole. Get out and find a real man
I would say no. Something fishy going on I think…
Hmm sounds like cheating to me. If he says hes going to his families house and since they are your family also by marriage just show up. Excuse the kids wanted to spend time with grandparents/uncle. My parents have been married over 40 years never needed to be invited over to each others parents house. I remember going to my dads mom n dad with my mom and going to visit my moms parents with my dad. And the other one wasnt there. Why stand back and not go with. Tell him if he goes you and the kids can go to.
Leave him. It’s that simple. Do what’s best for you and your kids!
Leave him, find someone that will spend time with you and the kids
answered your own question.
uhhh, what kind of question is that? why in the world are you wasting your time being with that selfish pos?
Next time he says he’s going to his brother’s house. In the evening or on the weekend. Just show up. You & all the kids. Just show up. I’d start making some plans of your own on the weekends. Have a girl’s day. Hell if u even have to go park at the park. & nap. Just do something. Leave him w all the kids
I really don’t believe there are women out there that put up with this and think it’s ok. Who the hell do these men think they are and what kind of woman puts up with it?