AITA for being mad at my spouse for missing our daughters birthday dinner for training?

Am I in the wrong for being frustrated that my SO called me to tell me that he wouldn’t be there for her daughter’s birthday dinner tonight because he’s in training. Then when I expressed that I was frustrated because he had not let either of us know in advance (actually the opposite when talking about it yesterday) and it would disappoint our child, he hung up on me.

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Depends on what he’s training for… if it’s work and it’s needed to provide for the family then I’d let him off. If he’s training in the gym for leisure then he’s absolutely in the wrong! x

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Maybe he feels really bad about it, and didn’t like the added salt to the wound. How old is your daughter? Too young to understand that work comes first sometimes, then she won’t notice that you are celebrating the next day. Old enough to understand that work comes first sometimes?, then she’ll understand why you are celebrating the next day.

How did you express your frustration, which is understandable? Did you come at him and attack? Or was it in a way that took in account his feelings as well?

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For real !? The man is in training not in a vacation to Hawaii :woman_facepalming:t2: You don’t think he would want to be at the party for his DAUGHTER if he could !? Come on now smh

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Could there be a chance , he didn’t know in advance , yes it’s frustrating , how old is the child , can you have a seperate dinner with just you her and her dad, and make it special , to make up for him not being there., I’m sure he didn’t mean to upset anybody, sometimes jobs just the
Row things out last minute

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Is it training for work? My husband has missed birthdays and anniversaries for work. It happens

To much missing information… what is the training for ?

For me it’s missing info… Depends what he’s training for. If it’s for a job that is really needed then that’s more important in the long run. They may not have informed him earlier or changed info on him and being a new employee you probably wouldn’t want to rock the boat at least if it’s a good job that is needed… If it’s for something unimportant then obviously he should have rescheduled

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My husband has missed mine and all three of my kid’s birthday this year because he works. That’s life for us. I just remind my kids he will celebrate with them when he’s off. They wouldn’t have a birthday with special things if he didn’t work :woman_shrugging:t2:

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Could it be training for a sports game rather then work. Why has everyone jumped to training for work. It does make a huge difference if it’s for a sports game and your daughter is older then he has just shown her his priorities. I just hope she is to young to know and dad wakes up to himself. If it’s training for work it’s teaching her the importance of work and sometimes work comes first, I just hope he makes it up to her for missing the dinner. But my biggest question what work trains at night thats not organised prior :thinking:

He could’ve said something sooner if he knew sooner but sounds like he didn’t know. Either way, don’t make him feel bad. I know what it is like to have to work on special occasions for the kids

Maybe he didn’t know training would overlap the dinner and that’s why he didn’t say anything. If this training is for work, most jobs require you to be there for all training or you could lose the job. It also looks bad. I’d love to have my birthdays off, but in the real life, that’s not always an option.

Depends if it work related and necessary then yeah you have no right to be angry. Bummed out sure but not taking it out on him.

If he is training for work yes you are in the wrong .
He and your daughter can do something together to celebrate

There’s not enough information for anyone to be commenting on this

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Military? It’s normal to miss it and normal to be upset. Your feelings are valid.

do you want a roof over your head or him to eat a dinner?